


Of Walkers and Wanderers

by Mothman0567



Category: The Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: Canonical Character Death, Daryl Dixon Has a Crush, F/M, Non-Graphic Rape/Non-Con, Original Character Death(s), Slow Burn, reader has a family, reader is a badass
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-10-16
Updated: 2018-11-30
Packaged: 2019-08-03 00:07:03
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 11
Words: 34,111
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16315274
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mothman0567/pseuds/Mothman0567
Summary: You have a family to protect. Your mother, your brother, your 6 year old half sister. Surviving wont be easy and living will be even harder. Luckily you have your new friends to help you hold on to whats important, and to catch you when you fall. Not to mention an angel ever at your side.Y/N has been with the group since the beginning. Going all the way to s8 and then some.





	1. How Do We Start

**Author's Note:**

> Hello, this is my first fic. Construction criticism is appreciated, and tips for beginners is much loved. If you spot any mistakes please let me know. Thank you and enjoy!!

_You drew the string of your bow. Your breath hitched, your eyes focused, your target in your site. The deer was none the wiser, she didn't know you were there. The arrow spit through the air like butter. It found its mark and the deer fell. A large hand clasped onto your shoulder. You smiled up at the man who looked down at you with proud eyes._

_"Good job, Sweetheart."_

"Y/N!" 

Two hands on your shoulders slightly shaking you woke you up from your dream. It was impossible to keep the disappointment from your face when you looked up to see your brother, Ellis, instead of your father. "Good dream?" he asked. You sat up rubbing the sleep from your eyes. "Yeah, was hunting with dad."

You saw Ellis frown but you choose to ignore it. You knew he didn't like hearing you talk about him. Both him and your mother despised the man. When they divorced your brother stopped visiting him, choosing to instead stay with your mother and her new boyfriend, Brock. You hated Brock with a passion. You chose to split your time between them, much to your mothers dismay. You loved your dad more than anyone. He taught you to hunt and took you camping. 

Brock could never replace him. He was kind to your mother, and he supported your brother, but he was rude to you. He didn't like how much like your father you were, and often got into fights and arguments with you about it. Always turning it around to be your fault. It put a strain on your relationship with that side of your family. And even now your mother and you struggled to get along very well. Brock was probably dead and you mother still hadn't forgiven you for leaving him behind.

"Y/N, did you get any of that?" Ellis said, looking at you with a slightly annoyed look on his face. 

"No, I was thinking 'bout something. Can you repeat it?" 

Ellis shook his head. "I'm leaving. Gonna go to Atlanta with a hand full of others on a run. Mom wants you to help her and the ladies with laundry." I nodded my head and reached for my bag. You couldn't help but be a little annoyed that you were stuck with laundry duty when your brother was out to run. You knew how to handle a gun, how to survive. He new how to play a guitar, and how to effectively stick the most marshmallows in his mouth. You two had the same parents but completely different childhoods.

Rummaging through your bag you felt the handle of your fathers gun. You pulled it out and inspected it to make sure it was loaded and the safety was on. "You know how the safety works?" you asked. Ellis reluctantly grabbed the gun giving it a once over. "Um.. no but I don't really have time to learn. I'll have someone show me on the way." You gave him a soft smile.

"Be safe, Elli"

"I will, I promise Y/N. I'll bring you back a souvenir. Maybe send you a postcard while I'm there." He ran out of the tent laughing when you chucked your bag at him.

\---

You got up and ready changing into a flannel shirt with a tank top underneath. You finally exited your tent in no rush to do laundry. You stopped for a moment inhaling the fresh air. A content smile on your face.

_When shit hit the fan you immediately went to you dads. You took everything you thought you might need. Your bow, his handgun, the camping supplies, and all the food you could carry. You then went to find your family. You picked your brother up from his job at Joe's Music Emporium, got your sis from kindergarten, and dragged your mother screaming out of the hospital where a beaten and unconscious Brock was left to die. You and your brother had taken your family to one of dads favorite camping sites._

_When you arrived you realized that someone had already beat you to it. They welcomed you into your group, and you helped them with whatever they needed. Whether that was laundry or the dirty work. It was usually always laundry. You hated laundry._

"Y/N!" You half sister, Addison, shouted your name as she ran up to you. "Y/N I caught a ladybug!" she held up her small hands and you squatted down to take a look. Sure enough, there was a tiny little bug in her palm. 

"Great job, sweetheart, why don't you go show that to mom? I bet she'd be ecstatic!"

"Is-at-ic?" she asked, tilting her head with a confused look.

"It means really happy, overjoyed even!" Addison broke out into a contagious smile. "Mama will be isatic!" she cupped the bug into her hands to protect it before running off to find your mother. You smiled as you watched her go. 

\---

You liked Shane, he stepped up and took charge to take care of the group. You liked Lori, too. She was kind, and you helped her with chores. Carol was motherly, but distant due to her douchebag husband Ed. Her daughter, Sophia, would play with Addison. So would Carl. Amy was a sweet girl. She liked to braid your hair. You were able to braid it better yourself but you always let her do it for you anyways.

Her sister, Andrea, liked keeping watch. She had a handgun of her own from her father just like you. The two of you rarely talked, but you didn't dislike her. She was close with Dale who was a good man. You two often talked in the early mornings. Glenn and you were also quick friends. He often went on runs to Atlanta alone. Jimmy, T-Dog, Morales, Jacqui, and few others were also a part of your group but you didn't really know them as well. You never really talked to them much. 

Then there were the Dixon brothers. They showed up one day causing a stir in the camp. The oldest brother, Merle, kept running his mouth making everyone rather upset, and Shane wouldn't have let him into the group if it wasn't for their hunting skills. Well, Daryl's hunting skills. He kept the group fed so people put up with his brothers foul mouth. You'd occasionally hunt with the younger Dixon, though he usually always went alone. He had been gone for days this time. Trying his luck further out. He still hadn't come back.

Speaking of people not coming back, your brother was still gone in Atlanta and you were starting to worry. You reassured Amy that there was nothing to worry about, but your mind raced to all the scenarios that could go wrong. You hoped your brother would be back soon. As if your wishes were heard, the blaring of a car siren tore you from your thoughts.

Everyone became alert when they heard the sound. "Talk to me Dale," Shane shouted. "I cant tell yet." he replied looking for the source with his binoculars. "Is it them are they back?" Amy asked from right next to you. "Well, I'll be damned" Dale muttered. "What is it?" you asked. "A stolen car is my guess he answered, lowering his binoculars.

Glenn pulled up in a red sports car alone, a knot formed in your throat when you saw Ellis wasn't with him. Everyone swarmed him, Amy pelting Glenn with questions about Andrea while Shane and Jimmy quickly turned off the blaring sirens of the car. "Is she with you is she okay?" Amy asked for the hundredth time. "YES, shes fine, everybody is.... well Merle not so much." The knot in your throat disappeared when you head that. You were thankful that Ellis was fine.

"Are you crazy driving this wailing bastard up here?" Shane asked, "Are you trying to draw every walker for miles?" "I think we're okay," Dale said. "You call being stupid okay?" Shane shot back. "Well, that alarm was echoing all over these hills. Hard to pinpoint the source." Dale had a valid point. You admired him for the way he thought. He scolded Glenn and seconds later a large van pulled up most likely carrying the rest of the survivors.

Andrea and Amy ran to each other. Addison ran to Ellis giving him a hug and you joined them. Your mother appeared at your side but didn't get in on the group hug so you stepped back so she could hug Ellis, too. Ellis pulled your dads gun out of his belt and handed it back to you. You grabbed it and put it in your gun holster attached to your belt.

"Told you I'd be fine. And here." He reached in his pocket and pulled out a bullet necklace. "I brought you back a souvenir as promised."

You smiled and took the necklace. "Thanks, Elli. I love it." "I knew you would, you always did have poor taste, Y/N." You gave him a playful punch on the arm before putting the necklace on. 

You noticed someone new step out of the van. Someone not part of your group. He wore a police uniform and you wondered if he knew Shane. Looking over at Shane, you knew your answer immediately, and then you saw the look on Lori and Carl's face. They ran to this new man, who turned out to be Carl's dad, and the moment was so beautiful it brought tears to your eyes.

You hoped someday that would be you and your dad.


	2. Left in Atlanta

Everyone was glad to have the Atlanta crew back safe and sound. You learned that this new man was named Rick, and that he was Lori's "late" husband and Shane's best friend. The group gathered around the campfire that night while the others told everyone what happened in Atlanta, and Rick told everyone what happened to him before Atlanta.

Your mother retired early with Addie to your tent. You hadn't spoken to her properly since you dragged her away from Brock, and it was clear that she didn't want to talk to you. Ellis noticed the sad look on your face and he gave your hand a soft squeeze. You smiled up at him thankful that he didn't hate you, too. You thought back to the events that transpired before the dead walked the earth that led to Brock's shitty state.

_The two of you were home alone, the others were either at work or at school. Brock had you pinned to the kitchen counter. He had hit you pretty hard a few times in the stomach when you tried to run. Now his hands gripped your hips and wrists so tight you knew there'd be bruises. You just shut your eyes and tried to imagine you were somewhere else._

_Brock said your mom would believe him over you if you told her. What hurt the most was that you knew it was true. You packed and left to go to your fathers, despite the fact that you were suppose to spend the week at your mothers. He knew something was wrong right away, and you couldn't stop yourself from breaking down and crying in his arms when he asked if you were okay._

_Your dad beat Brock within an inch of his life when you told him._

_Your mom was devastated. She never left Brock's hospital room. Both her and your brother refused to speak to you after you paid your dads bail. When the world went to shit was the first time you talked to them in almost a month. Your brother had forgiven you, your mother hadn't. You cursed the fact that your father was out of town when it happened. She saw it as a blessing. She hoped he was dead._

You felt tears begin to prickle at your eyes for the second time that day. You decided to call it a night.

\---

Your tent had two beds in on either side. Your mother and Addison slept on the right side while you and Ellis shared the left bed. You were always a light sleeper, and you stirred awake when you heard Ellis zipping the tent open and closed. You felt the makeshift bed shuffle as Ellis got comfy. 

"Why are you still awake?" Ellis' voice brought you further out of your slumber, and you wondered for a second if he was speaking to you until you heard your mothers soft voice. "I couldn't sleep. I keep thinking about Brock." You felt a pang of guilt, even though you knew he deserved it. 

"Y/N shouldn't have left him there. He was in there because of her and now he's probably dead because of her!" she angrily spouted. You didn't move, didn't let it be known that you were awake. You knew that's how she felt but it still hurt to hear her say it. 

"That's not true," Ellis argued, to your surprise, "Dad put Brock in there. And if Y/N had tried to bring him along we'd all probably be dead. We had to get out fast, you know that." You were shocked to hear him say that, you thought he blamed you, too. You were so happy that it was difficult not to smile. 

"How can you say it wasn't her fault? She packs her bags and leaves. Suddenly your father is barging into our home and trying to kill my husband. Brock ends up in the hospital and that bastard doesn't even rot behind bars for it cause she goes and bails him out. How is it not her fault when she was clearly in on it." The silence that followed was defining. Your brother responded so quietly that you almost didnt hear him. "Maybe he deserved it."

Your mother cried herself to sleep that night. You didn't get much rest either. 

\---

Daryl's return was something that nobody looked forward to. Not because people didn't like him, but because they didn't want to have to tell him about Merle. You knew Merle was an asshole, and whatever he did that got him cuffed to a roof was probably fitting of the punishment, but you knew you'd be pissed if that was your brother there. 

You were with Dale when the walker was spotted. Him and the rest of the boys immediately started to beat it up with various weapons. Eventually Dale chopped off its head and the biter fell. There was some rustling in the woods and everyone was standing ready to take on the threat. You relaxed when the familiar face of Daryl appeared but nobody else seemed too happy about it.

“Son of a bitch that’s my dear!” Daryl shouted, storming over to the poor animal the walker had been chewing up. “Look at it all gnawed on by this filthy, disease-bearing, motherless, poxy bastard!” Daryl emphasized each word with a kick to the immobile walker.

“Calm down, son, that’s not helping.” Dale spoke up, hoping to calm the hunter, but only seemed to upset him more. Daryl got up into Dale’s face ready for a fight, “What do you know about it, old man? Why don’t you take that stupid hat and go back to ‘On Golden Pond’”

Daryl turned his attention back to the deer dead on the ground. “I’ve been tracking this deer for miles, was gonna drag it back to camp, cook us up some venison.” Daryl crouched down to inspect the damage. “What do you think? Do you think we can cut around this chewed up part here?” he asked looking up at the others gathered around.

Shane shook his head, “I would not risk that.” “Yeah, doesn’t seem like a good idea,” you agreed. Daryl sighed. “That’s a damn shame,” he stood up, “I got some squirrel, about a dozen or so. That’ll have to do.”

Suddenly the head of the walker started moving again. You were shocked to see it was still alive. Daryl scoffed, "Come on people, what the hell?" he shot the walker with his crossbow. "It's gotta be the brain, Don't y'all know nothing?" He walked off toward camp. Everyone followed him.

"Merle! MERLE! Get your ugly ass out here! I got us some squirrel, lets stew em up!" Your heart sank knowing what Daryl didn't.

Shane caught up with Daryl calling out to him, "Daryl, just slow up a bit I need to talk to you." Daryl turned to look at him. "About what?" he asked. "About Merle... There was a problem in Atlanta. Daryl glanced around at everyone who was watching. His eyes met yours for a second. 

"He dead?" He asked Shane. "We're not sure," Shane replied. Daryl was pissed at that answer. "He either is or he ain't!" he shouted. Rick stepped in, "no easy way to say this so I'll just say it." he said. Daryl looked at him confused. "Who are you?" the hunter asked. "Rick Grimes." Rick answered.

"Rick Grimes you got something you want to tell me?" Daryl said facing Rick. "Your brother was a danger to us all. So I handcuffed him to a roof, hooked him to a piece of metal. He's still there." Daryl was livid. "Hold on, let me process this. You're saying you handcuffed my brother to a roof, and you just left him there?!" Rick nodded, "Yeah." That's all Daryl had to hear before he got into a fight with Shane and Rick. You looked away, you didn't want to see this. 

Shane had him in a choke hold and Daryl eventually gave up. T-Dog had shown up suddenly during the altercation. "It's my fault, I dropped the key," T-Dog said. "You couldn't just pick it up?" Daryl snapped. "I dropped it down a drain." T-Dog replied. Daryl still looked pissed. "If it's suppose to make me feel better it don't." 

"Well maybe this will," T-Dog started, Daryl shot him a look but T-Dog kept talking. "Look, I chained the door to the roof so the geeks couldn't get at him. With a padlock." Daryl didn't reply. "It's gotta count for something." Rick said. 

"HELL WITH Y'ALL!" Daryl shouted, "Just tell me where he is so's I can go get him." You could hear the pain in his voice. You jumped a little when Lori spoke up next to you. "He'll show you, isn't that right?" She was pointing daggers at her husband. Rick looked to her and then back to Daryl. "I'm going back." he said.

\---

You caught Daryl when he was getting ready to leave to Atlanta. The two of you weren't that close, but you were closer to him than the majority of the group. You and Daryl would occasionally hunt together. Him with his crossbow and you with your compound bow. He gave you a few tips on how to track which was always something you struggled with. 

Daryl looked up as you approached. He still seemed pissed and you understood why. "Good luck in Atlanta, I hope you find Merle." you said. He scoffed at you, "Yeah, sure you do. Bet you hope he's dead, that we ain't gonna find him," he snapped. You glared at him. "Daryl, I know your mad but don't take it out on me. I do hope you find Merle, alive and well. I'm not gonna lie, I think he's an ass, but I wouldn't wish him dead."

"Whatever" Daryl said. He wouldn't look at you, he felt bad for lashing out at you but he was upset and he just wanted to get to his brother. You left him so he could finish getting ready to leave. You'd go with but you barely got any sleep last night and Ellis talked you out of it. You just hoped everything would be ok.


	3. Holes

You rummaged through your bag looking for the charm that your grandmother gave you when you were little. It was a small Irish fairy that she promised you would bring you good luck. Cursing, you dumped your bag onto the bed and continued to rummage through it. You heard the zipper to your tent opening as someone stepped in. 

"Ellis, have you seen grandma's good luck charm?" You asked, not looking as they entered. You were shocked when it was your mothers voice that replied. "Did you check in your arrow thing?" You whipped your head around to look at her. She was standing their sheepishly, you wondered why she came in to do. "Oh... um.. no. Good idea." you muttered, going to grab your quiver. 

The quiver had been a gift from your father. It wasn't just a quiver for your arrows, but also a small backpack. And it even had a hook to attack your bow to. You had become good at clipping and unclipping your bow in seconds while wearing the quiver/backpack. You didn't know why you hadn't checked it sooner, you always brought the charm hunting with you.

Rummaging through the backpack you spotted the little fairy. A smile broke out onto your face as you pulled it out, showing your mother that she was right. "Thanks, mom. I want to lend it to Daryl when he leaves. I was starting to think I wouldn't find it on time." She gave you a soft smile. "You better hurry then, they're leaving right now."

You nodded, about to walk out the tent when your mothers quiet voice made you freeze. "I love you, Y/N." You felt tears prickling at your eyes. You didn't turn to her, afraid of what expressions she'd see. Afraid she'd be hurt to see how shocked you were to hear her say that. "I... I love you too, mom." you croaked out, your voice cracking. You quickly raced out of the tent.

\---

True to your mothers word, the boys were about to leave for Merle. Daryl seemed restless, like he couldn't wait a second longer. He noticed you walking toward him and he scowled. "The hell you want, woman?" he snapped at you. You shot him an unamused look. "I came to give you this," you said as you held out the charm. 

He took it from you giving it a once over before shooting you a confused look. "The hell is this?" he asked. You smiled at him. "It's a good luck charm. To keep you safe and help you find your brother." He glanced up at you before looking back down at the charm. "You really think this piece of plastic s'gonna help? cause it ain't." he growled out at you. You frowned and looked away, feeling a bit stupid for thinking that Daryl believed in something like that. 

He noticed the change in your expression. Feeling a bit guilty, he pocketed the charm, "Worth a shot I guess," he muttered, "thanks, Y/N." You looked back up at him, surprised to see a small blush on his face. You blushed too, giving him a small smile. "Take care, Daryl."

\---

You sat on the edge of the camp with Amy as she silently braided your hair. The birds and insects in the woods filled the air and you let out a sigh of content. You valued these moments now more than ever. Growing up, you spent a lot of time outside alone. You'd never had many friends, and you never really minded so much. Sure, there were many moments were you felt lonely, but now you were always surrounded by people. You came to value these moments more.

The sun beat down on you, and that mixed with the gentle breeze made you feel like a satisfied cat. You wished you could sit here sun bathing forever. Not a care in the world. Someone gently tugging at your hair turning it into little works of art. The sounds of the wilderness lulling you to a sense of security. You considered going hunting today, though you knew you weren't half the tracker that Dixon was.

Amy started lightly humming a song you didn't recognize, but the beautiful music she made seemed to belong in this moment. This was bliss, you felt content, something that was rather rare after the world fell. You noticed out of the corner of your eyes that Lori was making her way toward the two of you. You prayed to every deity you knew that she'd turn around and head the other way. Your prayers were not answered.

"Why don't you girls stop lazing around and come help out with laundry. We could use it." She said, crossing her arms as she shot a look at you that reminded you of when your mother would scold you for having a dirty room. You felt Amy's fingers leave your hair. "Great timing, I just finished Y/N's hair. Don't she look pretty?" Lori smiled at Amy, "She's gorgeous. You'll have to do my hair for me later."

Lori turned around to get back to her chores, you and Amy both got up to follow her. All good things must come to an end. 

\---

You were at the lake with the rest of the woman doing laundry. You wished you had announced that you were going hunting earlier before Lori had asked you to help. You sighed, the gentle breeze was gone and all that was left was the scorching Georgia heat. 

You wondered where Lori even was. She certainly wasn't here helping with the washing. Shane and Carl where at the lake with you, though they were catching frogs and not washing clothes, so you knew Lori wasn't off shacking up with him in the woods.You wondered if she even still did that now that Rick was back. You wondered if that was something they ever even did in the first place.

You always noticed when the two disappeared together, and later you'd see Lori come back with her clothes slightly disheveled and a blush to her face. Shane would come back not too long after with a satisfied smile. It wasn't difficult to put the pieces together. You didn't think any differently of her for it, after all she thought her husband was dead, but you still wondered what become of their secret relationship when Rick stepped back into their lives. 

Shane started splashing wildly and shouting, his voice and Carl's laughter both pulling you from your thoughts. You smiled, happy to see the kid having a good time. Jacqui was less impressed. "I'm beginning to queston the division of labor here." she said. "Can someone explain to me how the women wound up doing all the Hattie McDaniel work?"

"The world ended didn't you get the memo?" Amy replied. "It's just the way it is." Carol softly added. You sighed again. "I miss my video games." you said. Andrea sighed along with you. "I miss my Benz, my Sat Nav." "I miss my coffee maker," Jacqui added, "with that dual-drip filter and built in grinder, Honey." You couldn't agree more, you missed coffee too. You missed chocolate even more. 

"My computer," Amy added, "and texting." "I miss my vibrator," Andrea deadpanned. You softly laughed, Jacqui, Andrea, and you all sharing a look. "Oh my god!" Amy laughed out. Carol shot a glance behind her at Ed before turning back to the group. "Me too," she said. We all burst out laughing.

The moment was short lived when Ed sauntered over. "Whats so funny?" he spat. "Just swapping war stories, Ed." said Andrea. "Yeah." Carol quietly replied. I looked over at her, worry written over my face. We went back to quietly doing our laundry hoping Ed would just leave. He continued to stand behind us. 

"Problem Ed?" Andrea asked. "None that concerns you." he replied. You wished you could smack him in his face. "And you outta focus on your work," Ed said to Carol. "This ain't no comedy club." You want to hit him doubled. Andrea seemed just as pissed. She threw done her sponge and sprang up onto her feet. "Ed, tell you what," she said, turning toward the trash human being. "You don't like how your laundry is done you are welcome to pitch in and do it yourself. here." she threw the wet shirt at him. He grabbed it and threw it back, smacking her in the face. "Ain't my job missy." he snapped.

You sprang up onto your feet quickly joining Andrea at her side. Carol along side her. "Andrea, don't," she pleaded. "What is your job, Ed?" Andrea asked, taking a step closer. She was starting a fight, you knew and you were ready to defend her. "Sitting on your ass smoking cigerettes?" she continued. "Well, ut sure as hell aint listening to some uppity smart-mouthed bitch. Tell you what." Ed bit back. "Come on," he shouted at Carol, "Let's go." 

Carol moved to follow him but you stopped her. "Don't do this, Carol, we ain't gonna let him hurt you." you whispered to her. Your eyes pleading. She looked up to meet you. Her eyes were filled with such pain. "I have to," she replied, her voice below a whisper so only you'd hear. Your heart broke a little. "I don't think she needs to go anywhere with you, Ed" Andrea said. Stepping in front of Carol as well so the two of you both blocked her from her abuser.

"I say it's none of your business." he said, turning back to Carol once more, "Come on now, you heard me." "She ain't going anywhere with you." you snapped. Carol made a move to get to him again but you and Andrea both stopped her. "Girls, please, it doesn't matter." she begged. Amy had gotten up and joined you three now. "Hey," Ed's voice rang out making both you and Andrea turn to him, "Don't think I wont knock you on your ass, just cause you some college educated cooze, All right?" he said, looking down at Andrea in an attempt to intimidate her. 

He then turned to you giving you the same intimidating look, "And you think you some tough chick but I'll kick your ass too if I have to." He growled out. You shot him a glare. Andrea gave a shocked gasp at his rude remark to her looking back at Amy and Carol. "Now you come back now or you gonna regret it later." he told Carol, reaching a hand out to her. 

"So she can show up with fresh bruises later. Ed?" Jacqui asked, now standing with you and the others. Her voice letting on how distraught she was. "Yeah we've seen them." Ed laughed. "Stay out of this," he said, "Now come on!" he shouted before glaring back at you and Andrea. "You know what? This ain't none of y'all's business. You don't keep prodding the bull here, okay? Now I am done talking. Come on." He reached out and grabbed Carol's arm, yanking her toward him. 

Andrea and you both tried getting in between them, Andrea trying to push Ed away while you tried to get his tight grip off Carol's arm. You were sure she's have a bruise there later, and you weren't gonna let her go off with him to get even more of them. "Carol you dont have to go." Andrea pleaded. "Ed let go off her now." you shouted at him. Ed ignored both of you, instead he started to scream at his terrified wife. 

"YOU DONY TELL ME WHAT! I TELL YOU WHAT!" he screamed, his grip on her only tightning. He whipped his hand back and smacked her in the face. The sound of skin making contact echoing in your ear. The screaming, the beating, the whole situation make you think of Brock. Your stomach twisted into a knot as you froze for a split second. Andrea and Amy both shrieking as Carol let out a broken sob. Their cries tethering you back to reality, to this man who wasn't Brock but who had hell to pay.

Andrea started hitting him with the shirt she was still holding, Amy holding Carol back, as Jacqui tried to pull Ed away and you pounding on his chest with all your strength in hopes he'd let go of Carol to stop you and the of the girls. Ed continued screaming at her, the rest of us started hollering back at him. It was hard to hear what anyone was saying in the heat of things.

Shane appeared out of nowhere like a godsend, dragging Ed off of Carol. Amy held her close as she continued crying out. Ed was shouting at Shane to get off of him but the cop didn't listen. Shane through Ed to the ground and started punching the shit out of him. Carol cried out to him to stop, Amy tried consoling her. Shane did not stop. The punches kept coming and coming. 

The familiar feeling you dreaded came back. Another memory of Brock, this time of him on the ground, your dad on top of him beating him relentlessly. Your mother crying out, begging him to stop, Ellis holding her back, afraid of her getting hurt. Addison confused and crying as this stranger beat her father. You standing there in the doorway watching. You remembered your mom begging you to stop him but you ignored her. He didn't stop till the police arrived and they dragged him off his body. He beat Brock into a coma that he'd never wake up from. He killed him and you were glad. And now here you stood watching a similar scene unravel and as the rest of the girls begged Shane to stop you stood there hoping for a similar outcome.

The wish made you feel guilty and uncomfortable. The knot in your stomach only tightening. It was inhuman to wish for someone's death, but you didn't see any other way to stop him for hurting others. Only death would stop Ed from hurting Carol, just as it stopped Brock from hurting you. Shane stopped eventually. Muttering a threat to a still conscious Ed that if he ever hurt Carol or Sophia again he would beat him to death before he delivered a final punch. He got up, kicking Ed in the side, and Carol ran to Ed, crying hysterically and apologizing over and over again.

\---

You were in the woods away from the camp enjoying the peace it brought. The day had been eventful and after explaining what happened to your mother and Ellis, who had both been gathering firewood, you decided that some time in the woods would be therapeutic. Your back rested on the trunk of a log and you lifted your head to look at the rays of light that filtered it's way through the leaves of the towering trees. You let go of the breath you didn't realize you were holding, and you closed your eyes to listen to the birds around you. 

You heard a some shuffling and a giggle, and when you re-opened your eyes you saw your little sister, Addison, staring down at you from on top of the log. "What are you doin'?" she asked, a wide smile on her face. "Are you sleeping out here?" You shook your head, "No, I'm not sleeping silly. I'm listening to the birds." She was quiet for a moment, you wondered if she was trying to listen to them as well. She looked at you with a pout. "That's boring, I wanna do somethin' fun!"

You laughed lightly, rolling your eyes before they landed on some wildflowers growing by the trunk of a nearby tree. "Do you wanna make flower crowns?" you asked, looking back up at her. Her face lit up, "Will you show me?" she asked, her eyes full of wonder. You nodded, "Go pick as many flowers as you can hold. I'll teach you how to weave them." "Weave?" she asked, confused. You explained to her what weaving was as the two to you ventured around the forest gathering more than enough flowers for your crowns.

"I wanna make one for Mama!" she exclaimed happily. "I bet she'd love that," you replied. "And I wanna make one for Ellis and Sophia and Carol and Amy and Dale!" She continued, you wondered how many flowers you would need, you worried she'd continue listing everyone in camp. "We are gonna need a lot more flowers." you joked. The was a small moment of silence before she spoke up again. "And... and I wanna make one for daddy, even though he isn't here yet. When do you think he'll get here?" You didn't know what to say to that, you wondered if Addison even understood the concept of death. 

"Uh.. look, there's some pretty looking flowers over there." you changed the subject, hoping the yellow flowers would distract her from the topic.

\---

You and Addison sat together at camp weaving delicate crowns of flowers from the batch you gathered in the woods. Addison had difficulty at first, but she quickly caught onto the pattern, both your fingers moving like clockwork. Ellis had beamed when Addie gave him his crown. Your mother smiled wider than you'd seen in a long time. Dale thanked her when she put his crown onto his hat, and Sophia joined in to help us weave the rest of them. Afterwards Addie and Sophia went off to play princesses together, both of them dawning their crowns.

You wore yours along with the few flowers stuck into your side french braid. You looked down at the two remaining crowns, you knew one was for Amy when she returned from her fishing trip, you wondered who the last crown belonged to. You looked up, looking around to find the two girls laughing near the treeline. "Addie!" you called out. She looked at you and you held up the last crown. "Who is this for?" you asked her. 

"Daryl!" she called back, "To make him feel better!" You smiled back at her, setting the crown down by Amy's. You knew Daryl would never in a million years get caught with something like a flower crown but the fact that Addie thought to make him one made you happy. You were glad to be the sister of such a sweet girl. 

You saw Andrea and Amy walking back with a huge catch of fish. A look of satisfaction and pride on both the girl's faces, "Look at that!" Morales said, Andrea handed him the bundle of fish and he happily thanked them. "Because of you, my children will eat tonight. Thank you!" "Thank Dale," Andrea modestly replied, "It's his canoe and gear." Everyone happily thanked the girls for their catch. Happy that they'd go to bed with a full belly tonight. 

Addison ran over to give Amy her flower crown. "Your the queen of the lake!" she said happily as Amy bent down to let the little girl place the crown on her head. "Why thank you," she said, giving her a warm smile, "I'm honored!" She turned back to Andrea and Lori, the later who was curious of their fishing skills. Addie returned to Sophia's side, and you went to put Daryl's crown away somewhere safe where it wouldn't get trampled or sat on.

When you returned you saw Dale walking back to camp, a worried expression on his face. "I.. uh... I don't want to alarm anyone, but.. uh. We may have a bit of a problem." that caught the adults attention, you shot Ellis a confused look that he returned. Shane got up from where he was sitting and joined Dale who pointed over where Jimmy was. The group followed the two of them as they went to see what he was up to.

When you got there Jimmy was digging at the ground. He glanced up at the lot of you before going back to what he was doing. You wondered what he was doing before turning to Ellis. "Maybe you should take Addie to the lake?" you asked him, he met your eyes for a moment, seemingly understanding what you were implying.  
Okay, Addie, let's go swimming." he said as he picked up the young girl. You were thankful that she seemed happy at the idea. 

Your mother suddenly replaced Ellis at your side shooting you a confused look. You shrugged, letting her know that you knew as little as she did. "Hey Jim," Shane spoke up, Jim not stopping his digging, "Jim, why don't you hold up, all right? Just give me a second here, please?" he continued. Jim sighed, stopping what he was doing to turn to Shane. "What do you want?" 

"We're all just a little concerned, That's all." Shane answered. "Dale says you been out here for hours," Morales said. "You must be exhausted," you added. "So?" Jimmy said, shrugging. "So why you digging?" Shane asked. "What does it matter? I'm not hurting anyone." The exhaustion was clear in Jim's voice. "Yeah, except maybe yourself its 100 degrees today you cant keep this up. "Sure I can watch me!" Jim shouted as he continued to dig. 

You looked at your mother, she looked scared. You considered putting a hand on her shoulder, maybe giving her a reassuring smile, but you didn't know if your mother would be okay with that. She had told you she loved you earlier, she even came to stand next to you, but you didn't know if your relationship had been mended enough for you to comfort her just yet. 

They're not gonna come out and say it so I guess I will," Lori started, "You're scaring people. You're scaring my son, and Carol's daughter, and Sandy's daughter, too." You were surprised to hear her mention your mother, Sandy, too. Though, you didn't really know why. You knew Lori and Carol spoke to her quite often given that they were all mothers, but looking back you don't think you've ever heard anyone addressing her by name before. 

You wondered how social she was, or if she talked to anyone else. You hoped she wasn't excluding herself. "They got nothing to be scared of." Jim spoke, out of breath from the labor he put on himself. "I mean, what the hell people I'm out here by myself why don't you all just go and leave me the hell alone?" Your mom looked over at you worried. You decided to try and hold your hand and you were happy when she entwined her fingers with yours as she looked back at the scene. 

Shane stepped forward, "we think you need to take a break, okay? Why don't you go and get yourself in the shade? Some maybe, I'll tell you what, maybe in a little bit I'll come out here. I'll help you myself." Jim kept digging. Shane continued, "Jim, just tell me what its about? Why don't you just go ahead and give me that shovel?" Jim finally stopped, turning toward Shane, "Or what?" Shane looked taken back by the question. "There is no or what," he said, "I'm asking you, I'm coming to you, and I'm asking you, please. I don't want to have to take it from you."

"And if I don't, then what? Then you're gonna beat my face in like Ed Peletier, aren't you?" At the mention of Ed, your mother let go of her hand, instead crossing her arms. You looked at her but she kept her eyes glued to Shane and Jim. You knew Ed must have reminded her of Brock, and the way she seemed to stand further away from you know hurt like hell.

"Y'all seen his face, huh? What's left of it." Jim said, raising his voice. "See, now that's what happens when someone crosses you." You saw your mother move out of the corner of your eye and you looked back at her retreating to camp. You shot one last look at the group arguing with Jim and made to follow her.

"Mom," you called out, running to catch up to her, "Mom wait!" She stopped when she reached the fire pit, turning to face you. You took in her tear stricken face and her trembling lips. "Mom? What's wrong?" you asked. She looked down, shaking her head lightly. "Why? Y/N, WHY?" she shouted, uncrossing her arms to wave them dramatically at you. "Why did you do that to Brock? MY Brock?" Her voice cracked on that last part, tears pouring down her face. You felt your own pocking at your eyes.

"I..." you said, but you were at a loss for words. You were afraid she wouldn't believe you if you told her the truth. "I don't think there's anything I can tell you to make you feel better. He deserved it." You didn't mean to say it, and you spoke it so quietly that you wouldn't have thought she had heard you if she hadn't started sobbing. You felt the hope of your mother forgiving you dissolve into nothing as she left to go cry in your tent. You watched her leave, and you lifted your hand to your face, surprised when your fingers came back wet. 

You wondered when you had started crying.

\---

"You know what I heard?" Ellis asked to you before shoving another fork full of fish into his mouth. You took a sip of your water before turning to him. "What?" you asked, before setting your water down and accepting the plate Amy handed you. "Cattle," Ellis answered, a smile breaking on his face as he watched your reaction. You rolled your eyes and turned to your fish. "You better knock it off with them jokes before I throw you in the lake," you answered as laughed slightly. "Cattle..." you muttered. Amazed by how ridiculous his joke had been. "You've outdone yourself."

You turned to see the others talking to Dale about his watch. You looked around, not surprised to see your mother hadn't joined you. You hoped she hadn't cried herself to sleep. Addison was with Sophia, and her and Amy where the only ones still wearing their flower crowns. Her and Sophia were giggling to each other quietly, you were happy they had become such good friends.

Dale had a smile on his face as he quoted something he's read before, "A father said to his son when he gave him a watch, that had been handed down through generations, he said 'I give you the mausoleum of all hope and desire, which will fit your individual needs no better than it did mine or my fathers before me; I give it to you not that you may remember time, but that you may forget it for a moment now and then, and not spend all your breath trying to conquer it.'"

"You are so weird," Amy said. Everyone laughed enjoying themselves. After a moment Amy stood up turning to leave. Andrea stopped her asking her where she was going. "I have to pee," Amy responded, "Jeez you try to be discreet around here." There was another chorus of laughter as you continued enjoying your fishy feast.

"Man I wished people laughed like that at my jokes," Ellis muttered. You gave him a playful nudge. Suddenly, a scream tore your attention away from your brother as you turned to find the source. You saw Amy at the RV, a walker ripping a chunk of her arm out with it's teeth. Everyone jumped up screaming. You grabbed Addie who had started crying and darted toward your tent, ripping it open and throwing her unto your mothers arms. You assumed she woke up to the screaming.

You grabbed your bow and ran back outside, Ellis closed the door behind you and you handed him your fathers handgun. Shane was blasting them with a shotgun as Ellis tried to shoot them. The ones he did manage to hit didn't fall as he missed their heads. You grabbed an arrow from your quiver drawing your bow and killed a walker that had gotten close. You looked over and saw Jim beating one with a bat. 

You saw one walker too close to your tent and you quickly shot an arrow into its skull. A walker was arms reach from Dale who was firing his rifle at a different target. You quickly shot an arrow at the walker before it could bite the man who gave you a grateful look. You tuned to Ellis and saw a walker grab him but Ellis was able to shoot its head from point blank. He aimed at a different walker and pulled the trigger but the gun clicked signaling that it was out of ammo. 

"Get to the RV!" you shouted, hoping he heard you over the screaming, he looked at you and his eyes widened in horror. "Y/N BEHIND YOU!" he shouted, you spun around but the walker was on you before you could draw your bow. You held onto it with both arms trying to keep it away when an arrow that wasn't yours sank into it's head killing it. You saw Daryl and the others making quick work of the walkers. Daryl's eyes met yours and you gave him a nod before drawing another arrow and taking down another walker. The 5 of you made quick work of the walkers.

After the last walker fell Carl ran to his dads arms crying. Ellis went to your tent to make sure your family was okay and you went to the group to see who you lost. You saw Andrea knelt down by Amy who was covered in blood. You knew there was no way to save her and your heart hurt for it. Amy had been like a sister to you. You couldn't even imagine how her real sister felt. You didn't approach them, knowing that Andrea needed to be there alone. 

You saw your mother emerging from the tent, her eyes landed on the gory displace before her. They landed on you and she ran up to you, wrapping her arms around you into a tight embrace. You were thankful that Addie was in the tent with Ellis, you didn't want her to see this. Andrea bellowed in pain as she shook Amy's dead body. "I remember my dream now." you turned to Jim, a haunted expression on his face, "Why I dug the holes."


	4. The Lucky Ones

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The group handles the aftermath of the quarry attack and embark for the CDC.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you Hellbroke for your comments, they make my day 100 times better. :)

It seemed surreal. Like it hadn't really happened. Like you'd wake up in a cold sweat any minute now and everything would be ok. It was nothing but a nightmare. You'd change into your outfit for the day. You'd exit the tent and you'd be greeted by Amy. Beautiful wonderful Amy.

Amy who would make breakfast with Carol, who would scold you for sleeping in, who would grab you by the hand and lead you to a quite patch of grass where she would force you to let her braid your hair. Amy who would quietly hum a song you've never heard from before the world turned as her fingers kept working. 

Amy who laid before you covered in blood. Amy who had stopped breathing a while ago. 

You heard a devastated sob, and for a second you thought it had been you, but your mother had your shirt in her hands like a death grip as she struggled to breath and you quickly realized she was the one who was crying. You hadn't a tear in your eye. You were too sad to cry, you wondered if that was a thing. Perhaps you were just too shocked. 

"Breathe, come on, slowly now." you spoke in such a calming quiet voice. You wondered how you managed. "In, 1 2 3, out, 1 2 3. Come on, breathe with me." Your mom nodded, trying to follow your lead as you continued the slowed breathing. Eventually she was able to meet your pattern and the two of you continued to breathe till her panic attack subsided. 

"Addison is in the tent with Ellis, you should join them. You don't need to be out here." You whispered to her, you held her tight in your arms, thankful she was safe. She didn't respond right away and you continued to hold her. "That could have been you," she said, "You or your brother or your sister, dead on the ground."

You shushed her, petting her hair. "We're fine, we're alright, you have nothing to worry about," you tried to console her but she shook her head pulling away from you. "Someday it will be. Maybe even today. Your going to die, your siblings, too. I can't take it. I can't survive that." she ranted. Your tried to reach out to her but she pulled away from you again. "I'll go back to our tent. I'll go back..." she muttered, crossing her arms in a protective manner and not looking you in the eyes. You watched her retreat, it hurt that you couldn't comfort her at all. It was beginning to be a theme. 

Looking around you were able to see that everyone else was in a similar state of disarray. There weren't many that seemed quite able to do much of anything, especially not tend to the dead. Andrea still sat at Amy's side. Rick was with his family and Glenn was with Dale. Carol's husband, Ed, seemed to be another casualty. 

Your continued assessing the situation when your eyes met Daryl's. His expression was unreadable, you wondered if yours was the same. Suddenly, your eyes began to water as the first tear escaped. The adrenaline of the situation had worn off, and you saw Daryl's face twist into concern before you turned away from him. You rubbed your eyes with the palm of your hand as you quickly walked toward the treeline. 

You ducked behind the tree and sat down before your legs could give out. You felt the first sob escape your lips and you stopped holding it in. You dragged your knees up and wrapped your arms around them, burying your face as the grief took over you.

You heard someone walk up next to you, but you didn't look up see who it was. It could have been a walker for all you know but you still couldn't find the energy to do anything about it. The person, because you would be dead now if it was a walker, sat down next to you and carefully placed their hand on your shoulder. When you didn't pull away they started to rub small circles in your back in a reassuring way. 

The two of you sat there for a moment, your sobbing turned to crying which eventually turned to a mere drizzle of tears. You figured you knew who sat beside you, and you lifted your head to see if your suspicions were right. Just as you thought, Daryl had been the one who followed you. He was the one who watched you run off in the first place. 

"You alright?" he asked, pulling his hand away now that you had calmed down. "Y-yeah," you chocked out, "what happened with Merle?" Daryl looked away for a moment before turning back to you. If he was grieving he wasn't showing it. "He ain't there. Bastard cut off his own hand and ran off. Sonofabitch is out there somewhere" 

You gave Daryl a small smile. "I'm glad, I hope we find him." you said, still sniffling a little. Daryl looked away again and stood up. "Yeah," he said, "I gotta go." You watched him leave wondering if you said something wrong. Though, you quickly realized it was dumb to think that. There were a lot of bodies to tend to. Things that needed to be done. You wiped your face with your sleeve and stood up. 

It was time to get to work.

\---

You and Ellis threw the body into the flaming pile of already burning walkers. You sighed, wiping the sweat from your forehead. You looked over to Andrea where she still knelt next to Amy's dead body. You knew Amy was going to turn soon. You also knew that there was nothing you could do about it. Rick had already tried and Andrea has pointed a gun at him for it. 

"What are you guys doing?" Glenn asked and you turned around to see him stopping Daryl and Morales who were dragging a dead Ed to the bonfire. "This is for geeks. Our people go over there." "What's the difference? They're all infected." Daryl said as he stopped. "Our people go in that row over there." you could hear the distress in the smaller man's voice. "WE DON'T BURN THEM!" Glenn shouted.

"We bury them, Understand?" Daryl looked at him for a moment before picking Ed back up and dragging him to where Glenn wanted him to go. "Reap what you sow," the hunter snapped. "Y'all left my brother for dead, you had this coming." He stormed off and you followed him hoping you could provide him the same comfort he gave you earlier. 

He picked up his pickaxe and spun around, noticing you behind him. Before either of you could say anything you were interrupting by Jacqui's frantic shouting. "A walker got him, a walker bit Jim!" You and Daryl both ran up to the scene. "Show it to us," Daryl demanded. Jim grabbed a shovel to defend himself and T-Dog ran up behind him and grabbed both his arms to restrain him.

Dropping his weapon, Daryl ran up to Jim and pulled up his shirt revealing his bite. You gasped and looked toward Ellis. You saw your mom and Addison behind him. Your mother wore a haunted expression and Addison looked confused. Jim kept muttering the same thing over and over. "I'm okay I'm okay I'm okay I'm okay." The group watched in silence, everyone at a loss for what to do.

You were starting to think that Ed and Amy were the lucky ones. 

\---

The group discussed what to do next. Rick suggested the CDC. You figured it was the best bet, but you had your doubts. If it was even still up and running then who's to say they would even let you in? And that's only if they were still alive, the government fell. The army fell. The world fell and you were starting to lose hope, but you pushed those doubts aside.

You had to have hope. You have people who depend on you. Your family needs you. You needed to be hopeful for them. 

The group disbanded having decided that the CDC was the best bet. You and Ellis made your way over to where your mother sat with Addie. You filled her in on the plan and she only nodded. She never met your eyes, choosing to instead look at a patch of grass near your feet. Addison seemed like she wanted to say something but didn't. 

\---

Addison had been uncharacteristically quiet. You didn't think it was too strange given the events that had transpired. Still, you were worried. "Addie," you started, "you wanna talk about it?" She didn't stop rummaging around the tent when you spoke to her. "No... I wanna give Daryl his flower crown," she stated finally finding the flowery gift she had been looking for. 

You were surprised to say the least. It was such a strange thing to want to do on such a depressing day. You wondered if it was because the day was so depressing that she would want to cheer it up with something that had brought everyone so much joy the day prior. Still, you didn't think Daryl would like the gift then and you thought he'd hate it even more now. 

"Maybe that's not such a good idea, sweetheart," you started, "he isn't in a good mood right now." Addison stopped, seeming to consider it for a second before continuing with her plan. "That doesn't matter, this will make him happy!"

You smiled, following her out the tent. Her heart was in the right place, at least. 

Daryl was packing his things when you found him. He noticed the two of you approaching and sighed. "The hell do you want?" he shouted. His attempts at seeming hostile did not seem to ward of your little sister. You wondered if she was use to it, or if she was just determined. You figured it was the later. After all, her father seemed to be the nicest man in the world to everyone else. 

"I made you a flower crown yesterday!" Addison said, holding up the gift to the hunter. "Put it on! Put in on!!" Daryl seemed to actual consider it for a second before scoffing. "I ain't wearing that damn thing," he snapped. Addison's hands lowered. Her eyes got all watery. Great, you thought, Dixon just made my sister cry. You saw his face twist with guilt and he looked up at you for a second before returning his eyes to the younger girl. 

"Gimme that," he grunted as he grabbed the crown from her. "I'll attach it to my pack, but I ain't wearin' it." Addison's pout turned to a huge smile. "Do you like it?" she asked, her eyes lit up with joy. Daryl glanced at her, and then to you, before looking back at his things seemingly embarrassed. You could see him blushing. "Yeah," he said, "it's the best damn gift I ever got."

\---

You had been packing your things when you heard the gunshot that you'd found out by Ellis was for Amy. You couldn't stand to see Andrea hunched over crying so you went back to your tent. The funeral was even worse. You regretted attending, wishing you had instead stayed behind with your mother and sister. 

Watching Andrea lower Amy into her grave had made everything seem to official. That this was finally it. Amy was gone. 

Morales and his family decided to head to Birmingham since they had family up there. You all said your goodbyes and parted ways.

You and your family were in the RV with Dale, Glenn, Jacqui, and Jim. Ellis wasn't with you, instead he was riding with T-Dog and Andrea. Your mother still hadn't spoken since the incident, you decided to just leave her to grieve. Nothing you said to her seemed to cheer her up or even get through to her. Addison was looking at you, a frown on her face. 

"What's wrong?" You asked her as you lifted her and placed her in your lap. Addison was a silent for a moment as she got comfy on top of you. "Why isn't Amy coming with us?" She asked. You paused, not knowing what to say. Jacqui shot you a sad look before turning back to a sick Jim. "Well.. Amy can't come with us, she's gone." you said, trying to choose your words wisely. 

"I don't understand," Addie said looking up at you. You frowned and decided that maybe you needed to be upfront about it. About everything. "Addie, the world ain't like it use to be, those sick people you saw, the ones we call walkers and geeks, they are all dead. And when they get too close to you they attack you and they try to eat you." You hated the look that spread onto your half sisters face.

"If they're dead why are walking around? Why are they hurting people?" She asked you. You could tell this was upsetting her, but she needed to know. You needed her to understand. "I don't know sweetheart, I just don't know. But they killed Amy, and that's why she's gone." You could hear your voice cracking, and you felt the tears in your eyes again.

"And I'm sorry Addison but I need you to understand that we are in danger, and I promise I will protect you and I won't let anything hurt you but you need to know how dangerous they are." You were crying now, Addie started crying too. She buried her face in your chest and you held her close. You looked up too see your mother watching you. Her eyes were so haunted they sent chills down your back.

You held your sister even closer.

\---

The RV broke down on the way and during the pit stop Jim requested to be left behind. The group reluctantly agreed and you said your goodbyes before Addison pulled you aside. "I understand" she said in a small voice, "I get it now." You gave her a tight hug.

You asked Carol and Lori to take her in their car thinking it would be best if she was with Carl and Sophia. They agreed, and not wanting to go back in the RV with your mother you hoped into Daryl's truck without even asking him. He shot you a look but before he could say anything you stopped him. "If you want, I'll ride with Shane, but I'd rather ride with you."

He was silent a moment before starting up the truck muttering something under his breath. The two of you rode in silence.

"Why'd you stay?" You heard yourself asking. Daryl didn't respond right away. "Nowhere else to go." he said. More silence. "Why aren't ch'ya ridin' in the RV no more?" he asked. You looked out the window at the passing trees. "My mom isn't talking to me. She doesn't like me very much," you answered. "Why's that?" you pondered the question for a moment.

"I got her abusive prick of a husband killed I guess," you muttered, "I hope." you had said that last bit so quietly that you wondered if Daryl had heard it. You wondered whether or not you wanted him to. "Why's she even upset if the bastard was abusive?" he grunted. You scoffed, your eyes still glued to the window. "Cause that asshole wasn't abusive to her." Another pause of silence.

"M'sorry" he eventually said. You looked over at him and he was looking at you with something you couldn't recognize in his eyes. Understanding, maybe? Anger? 

You looked away again. "You have nothing to be sorry for," you muttered as you shifted in the seat into a more comfortable position, "wake me up when we get there."

\---

The group walked towards the CDC building which was surrounded by dead bodies. At least a hundred of them sprawled around the ground. You could hear a loud buzzing from the flies alone that fed off them. You had your bow clipped to your backpack/quiver and your father's gun ready in your hands. You and Ellis had both decided that until he learned to shoot it was better off in your possession. 

Ellis was holding Addison up with one arm as she hid her face in the crook of his neck. He held your moms hand tightly with his remaining hand almost as if she'd disappear if he let go. The group quietly made their way to the entrance of the building. You covered your mouth with the front of your shirt in an attempt to fight off the horrendous smell. Rick banged on the door, the shutters were down making it impossible to enter the building.

"Walkers!" Daryl alerted and you spun around to see a geek making its way toward us. Daryl made quick work of it with his bow before turning around to shout at Rick. "You led us into a graveyard!" "He made a call!" "It was the wrong damn call!" Shane told Daryl to shut up before turning to basically tell Rick the same thing. It was the wrong move.

It was almost dark out. Addison had started crying and Ellis was desperately trying to calm her down. Your mother stood silently next to him making no attempt to help with her child. You kept your gun in front of you watching out for more walkers. Everyone started heading back to the cars in a panic when Rick stopped us. "The camera it moved!" he yelled.

Everyone stopped for a  moment, we were all afraid. The sun was almost gone and we were far too close to the city. We had to move or we'd die. Shane tried talking sense into Rick but he didn't listen instead banging on the shutters loudly. Yelling at someone who wasn't there. Couldn't he see this was a graveyard? 

"You're killing us!" he shouted as Shane pulled him away. The sun was gone now, you were doomed. 

You heard a screeching noise and you turned around to see the shutters opening revealing a ray of light inside.

You've been saved.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've decided to make this a two part series. The first part will lead to the fall of the prison and the second part will pick up there all the way to season 8. Let me know your thoughts in the comments below.


	5. Gratitude

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The group finds sanctuary in the CDC, but they soon discover that all good things must come to an end.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you zozozo for your words! Your comment means a lot to me.

The group rushed into the CDC as the doors closed shut behind us. You were met by a man named Doctor Jenner who agreed to let you all stay if you took a blood test first. After he finished the required testing he offered you all food and alcohol. There was no way in hell you would turn something like that down, it had been days since you ate. 

You hadn't seen the group so happy before. Everyone laughed and joked around as you took sips of the wine that the doctor gave you. You never really liked alcohol, too bitter for your sweet tooth, but you drank along anyway. As with everything good in the group, Shane eventually ruined it. You noticed that ever since Rick returned Shane had become increasingly bitter.

You figured it was cause Lori wouldn't touch him anymore. Though, that's what you get for lying to a married woman about her 'dead' husband and then using it to get laid. As it turned out, everyone else either left or killed themselves. Jenner was the last one left because he wanted to find a cure, but it was too late. You felt bad for the man, Shane really pissed you off sometimes. It was neither the time or place to ask such a thing. 

Doctor Jenner gave the group a tour of the facility, he showed you all to the rooms. "If you shower go easy on the hot water," he finished before leaving. You felt a huge smile break out onto your face. You and Ellis picked out a room to put your stuff. Addison ran off to check the rec room with Carl and Sophia while you got ready to go straight to the showers. 

When the warm water head your face you briefly wondered if you had died and went to heaven. 

Afterwards, you wrapped yourself up in a towel. You hadn't felt this clean since before the walkers came. For once there wasn't a thick layer of dirt coating you. Humming Amy's song, you made your way back to your room. 

\---

You decided to walk around a bit before bed. Ellis had already tucked Addison in for the night and she wasted no time falling asleep. You mom was curled up beside her. They both looked so peaceful laying there.

Walking down the hall you spotted Daryl entering his own room with a bottle of whiskey. He swung the door shut behind him but it didn't close all the way so you took that as an invitation to go bug him. Walking over to his door, you knocked on it before sticking your head in. "Hello, anybody home?" you asked, spotting Daryl sitting on the floor by his bed with the bottle. 

He looked at you before taking another swig of the bitter liquid. You took the lack of 'go away' or 'don't bother me' as an invitation to join him so you walked in closing the door behind you and sat down on the bed next to were he sat on the floor. He offered you the bottle and you accepted it taking a swig of it similar to what you saw Daryl do. You gagged when you tasted it.

Your face scrunched up into a look of disgust that made Daryl laugh. "What's wrong, Y/N? Can't take your liquor?" He joked. You muttered a quick shut up as you handed Daryl back the bottle. "I'm too sweet for alcohol." you giggled. Daryl shot you a look. "Yer already drunk of that wine ain't ch'ya?"

You sprawled out on his bed laying your head on the pillow. "I'm not drunk," you lied, "just tired is all." Daryl got up and grabbed his bag zipping it open and pulling something out before handing it to you. You looked at the charm now in your hand and remember that it was the Irish fairy you gave Daryl before he left for Atlanta. "S'my charm," you said with glee. 

Daryl laughed again, finding a drunken Y/N quite amusing. "Damn thing really works," he muttered returning to his bottle and his spot on the floor. You said something along the lines of 'of course it did' but it came out slurred. The bed was so comfy compared to the blankets you were using at the quarry. An actual mattress, it felt like a cloud.

You recalled Daryl saying something but you didn't hear it. Your eyes became heavy and the world went dark around you.

\---

You awoke in what you assumed was the morning. Daryl wasn't in the room anymore and you felt bad and embarrassed that you had fallen asleep in his bed. You wondered were he slept and hoped he wasn't too upset about it. It was hard getting out of bed. It was so warm and soft. The blankets were wrapped around you. You didn't recall getting under them but you must have sometime in the night. 

Crawling out from the warmth of the bed, you made your way to the bedroom door. You peeked your head out to see if anyone was coming, not wanting people to know you slept in Daryl's room. You didn't want anyone to get the wrong idea. 

Seeing that the coast was clear, you left Daryl's room and quickly walked over to the one you shared with your family. Walking in, you noticed right away that the room was empty. You noticed that your clothes were cleaned and folded up on the bed. You figured Ellis had put it there. You blushed knowing that he knew you hadn't come back last night.

You changed into a black and white flannel with a grey tank top underneath and a pair of dark jeans. You then left your room to go check out the rec area. When you got there you were surprised to see it was empty and you wondered where everyone was. Perhaps they were all having breakfast? 

It didn't really matter, you were kind of glad to have the place to yourself. You didn't feel like talking to anyone right now anyway. You moved over to the bookshelves where you glanced over the titles of the medium sized library. Your eyes landed on one and you pulled it out of it's spot. 

'Wanderer' it was called, with the figure of a person facing away on it's cover. The person held a walking stick in one hand and a flower that you couldn't identify in the other. The silhouette wasn't completely black but was dark enough that you couldn't make out much detail. The cover screamed fantasy and you were living for it.

You sat atop a chair and folded your legs in a crisscross manner setting the book in your lap and slouching down to read the back. Your father would always joke that you were turning into a pretzel when you read, but you found this position to be surprisingly comfortable. 

'Milo Lewis walks the plains of hell in search for a way out when he comes across a flower that gives him the ability to help the dead find their own way home. Join him as he tries to survive the harsh underworld riddled with monsters while saving lost souls and earning himself a reputation as the Wanderer.' you read. It sounded interesting enough.

'I am but a man with a long stick and a poncho. That's all the Wanderer is. Someone lost... with a long stick and a poncho.' it began, but before your could continue to read you heard the AC turn off followed by a loud silence. Your paranoia kicked in full gear.

You got up and made your way back to your room now occupied by your family. Ellis was brushing Addison's hair and he looked up when he heard you enter. "How'd you sleep last night?" he asked with a knowing smirk. "How drunk do you think I was last night?" you asked him. Ellis just laughed, "drunk enough to pass out on Daryl's bed from what I've heard."

You groaned and you heard both him and Addie laughing again. "What's so funny," you asked shooting a teasing look at Addie. She smiled up at you before singing "Y/N and Daryl sitting in a tree~!" before she got the chance to continue you attacked her with tickles. She shrieked and giggled as she tried to squirm away from you.

"Let the record show that Daryl and I are not sitting in a tree. Nor will we ever climb a tree together. Twas nothing but a friendly bit of a drinking that led me to pass out in his bed forcing the poor man to sleep somewhere else." you stated in an attempt to end all teasing.

Ellis playfully scoffed, "you didn't force him to find a new bed, you just forced him to share his. And now if someone doesn't believe me when I tell them how clingy and cuddly you are when your sleeping I can tell them to ask Daryl. He told me everything this morning, bout how he kept having to roll you away from him and how when he woke up you were all snuggled into his side."

You felt your face turn red but before you could respond the lights turned off. You and Ellis shared a worried look and you went to the hallway to see what was going on. The lights in the hall were still on and you saw everyone else exiting their room seeming just as worried and confused as you.

"What's happening?" you asked Jenner when he starting making his way down the hall. The others joined in with their own questions.  
"Why's the air off?"  
"And the lights in our room?"  
"What's going on?" Daryl said popping out of his own room with another bottle of alcohol in his hand, "Why's everything turned off?"

Jenner grabbed the bottle from Daryl as he passed him, "energy use is being prioritized," he said. "Air isn't a priority? And lights?" "It's not up to me. Zone 5 is shutting itself down."

We all followed Jenner to the main computer room as Daryl shouted at him asking him what he meant. Rick and the others joined us and Rick quickly ran up to meet the doctor. "Jenner, what's happening?" he asked.

"The system is dropping all the nonessential uses of power. It's designed to keep the computers running to the last possible second. That started as we approached the half hour mark," Jenner explained gesturing up to the red digital clock as it continued ticking down. 31:27

You turned to Ellis and saw the worried expression on his face. He had Addie in his arms and she looked scared. You noticed your mother wasn't with him. "Where's mom?" you whispered. "He looked around and saw her absence, "maybe still back in the rooms? I had to drag her out of bed for breakfast today."

You nodded and glanced back at the Rick and Jenner before looking back to your brother. "I'll get her." you muttered before sprinting in the direction that you had came from. Just as Elliot had thought, your mom was laying in the bed curled up in herself. "Mom you need to get up. We got to go." you said as you grabbed your brothers bag and shoved everyone's clothes into it. 

You grabbed your bow and your quiver pack and put your book in it determined to read it later. The door opened and Ellis ran in with a even more scared Addie. "We got to pack," he said as he set Addison down. You handed him his bag already packed and he put it on his back before shoving a box of protein bars that had been sitting on your bed into your sisters panda backpack.

"We're locked in, This place is going to explode. The guys are trying to get the door open." Ellis informed you. You were terrified to hear it. Were you going to die here? Was this seriously how it was going to end?

You put your own pack on and clipped the bow in it's place and you grabbed your gun putting it in the waistband of your jeans. "Mom?" you heard Addison say as she crawled onto bed next to the prone state of your mother. She didn't respond and you joined your sister by her side. "Mom," you started, "if you don't get up I'll carry you." Still nothing.

You sighed and lifted your mother up princess style. You were surprised with how little she weighed and you wasted no time getting out of that now stuffy room and returning to the main area. Ellis was right behind you with Addison.

\---

The men were all hitting the door with axes but it wouldn't budge. Addison was crying and Ellis was trying to calm her down. He sat on the floor with the other mothers of the group and cradled little Addie in his arms. Your own mother was sitting in a chair watching Jenner as he rambled on and on about how hopeless this all was. 

You crouched down in front of her and grabbed both her arms looking her in the eyes. "Mom, we are getting out of here and we are going to live, okay? We are going to survive this world." She didn't seem convinced, instead she looked away back to Jenner as if she was holding on to all the twisted words he said.

You turned around and saw a pissed Shane running at the doctor with a shotgun. He threatened to blow the doctors head off and Rick tried to stop him but before he could Shane started blasting the computers to all hell. Rick wrestled the gun away and threw Shane to the ground. You looked at the clock. 6:48

"I think you're lying. About no hope. If that were true you would have bolted with the rest or taken the easy way out but you didn't," Rick stepped toward Jenner, "you chose the hard path. Why?" "It doesn't matter." "It does matter it always matters. You stayed when the others ran, why?" 

"Not because I wanted to. I made a promise to her," he said pointing to a screen that had a test subject on it, "my wife. She begged me to keep going as long as I could. How could I say no?" 

You heard a banging noise and looked behind you to see Daryl had returned to hitting the door with one of the axes. Jenner continued to rant about his wife but you couldn't find the energy to listed. The clock was running out. You had less than 5 minutes to live. 

You ducked your head, tears filling your eyes, as you turned away so others wouldn't see them. You were still crouched down in front of your mothers chair, her arms still held in your hands. You felt her hands wrap around your own arms and you looked up to see her watching you. 

"We're going to die," she whispered, "so tell me. Why did your father beat Brock the way he did?" You held your breathe, your watery arms pleading her cold intrusive ones. "He raped me," you heard yourself say in such a small, quiet, and vulnerable voice.

You were taken back a bit by it, never had you said it out loud. Even before, when your father had asked you all you could say was that he hurt you. Your father had to ask if it was rape, and you just broke down crying in response telling him all he needed to know.

And now here you stood. Your mothers mouth was agape, she looked absolutely devastated. "Y/N," she started, as she held your arms tighter, but before she could finish the two of you heard the sound of the door opening. Everyone rushed to the door and you stood up following Ellis as he carried Addison out to their freedom. You both stopped turning around to see that your mother hadn't moved. You both ran back to her and you grabbed her arm but she pulled away. 

"I'm not leaving. I'm not going back out there. You two can go but you leave my baby girl and you leave me." she said as she tried to grab Addison from Ellis but he pulled her away. "The hell you are," he said, "your coming with us ma please." She just shook her head. "I'm not leaving, you can't make me."

"We don't have time for this," you muttered as you tried to grab her to carry her but she fought you this time. She swung her arms around and kicked and scratched and you backed away when you couldn't get her. Addison was crying even harder now and you told Ellis to get out of here. "I'll be right behind you," you said trying to sound positive. He hesitated but eventually turned to join the others. 

Daryl had shot you a worried look but you shouted that you'd be out in a second with your mom. He nodded and made his way out with the others leaving you, Sandy, Jacqui, Dale, and Andrea behind. 

"Mom, please don't make this difficult." you begged but she didn't budge. "I'm not going out there to die. You're a monster for forcing your sister to." she snapped. "A monster just like your father. You even look like him. The same hair color, the same damn eyes. Your his spitting image and you sure do play the part." You were taken back by her words. 

"I don't see how that's an insult," you bit out as you pulled your gun out of your pants, "I'd rather be a monster like my father than a coward like you." You spun the gun around in your hand so that you were holding the barrel and, before your mother could stop you, you smacked her hard in the head with the butt of it knocking her out. 

You heard Jacqui gasp and you looked up at her, "Now we can both say we give each other headaches," you joked bitterly as you placed the gun in your waistband and lifted your mom for the second time in the last half hour. You followed Dale and Andrea out the compound and they helped you get your mother down from the shattered window. 

The four of you ducked down behind a wall of sandbags as the building behind you exploded. You held your mother tightly to your chest as the ground shook. Glenn opened the RV door and Dale and Andrea raced in and you made your way to the van were Ellis and Addison were calling to you. 

You sat there catching your breath as you all stood in shock next to what once was the CDC building, now just a pile of rubble. Eventually, the RV pulled out and turned around. T-Dog started the van and followed as the caravan drove away from what almost was their sanctuary. What almost was their tomb.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Gotta love me some happy sibling moments. Imminent death is such a buzzkill!


	6. Into the Woods

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tensions are high as the group hits the road again. Relationships are ruined, walkers are everywhere, and Sophia goes missing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Turns out people don't like getting knocked unconscious... haha whoops

Rick decided that we should try Fort Benning next. You had little hope that it was still running, but you pretended to have faith for Ellis and Addison who both looked at you for support. It was stressful having people who depended on you, but you stayed strong for them. You had to. 

Ellis put bandages on scratches that were deep enough to need one and Addison gave each 'boo-boo' a kiss to make you feel better. The three of you held each other in a group hug, none of you quite over what had happened earlier that day.

When your mother woke she started screaming and attacking you. She scarred Addison so much the little girl started to bawl again. You wished you could just knock her out again, she was so much more peaceful when she was unconscious. Things quickly became chaotic as you tried to hold your mother down as she clawed at you drawing more blood. Ellis couldn't step in to help with Addie clinging to him in fear that she might get hurt too. T-Dog had to stop the van, honking to alert the others, and Shane and Daryl were there in seconds to help calm her down.

The group decided then to ditch some of the cars since they were running on fumes. We had to get rid of the majority of them, only having one car, the RV, and Daryl's Motorcycle. Ellis suggested having Addison with the other kids and Carol offered to have her ride along in her lap since there was no room for anyone else. You thanked her about a million times and she gave you a hug before taking Addie from Ellis. 

"I'll ride in the RV with mom, maybe the two of you should stay away from each other for a while?" Ellis said, you shot him a confused look. "Where the hell else am I suppose to go, the car is packed. Ellis smirked. "You could always ask your boyfr-OUCH" you pinched him before he could finish. 

"Don't make me pistol whip you, too." you joked before making your way over to Daryl who was waiting to get the show on the road. "Hey Daryl," you started, "my mom hates me right now, can I ride with you?" you asked shooting him your best 'please say yes I'm desperate' face. "Thought your mom already hated you," Daryl snarked.

You gave him a sad smile. "Well now she hates me even more. Didn't think it was possible but here we are." Daryl just grunted in response. You stood there for a moment wondering if you should just suck it up and go to RV but Daryl interrupted your thoughts. "Well? Get on we ain't got all day." he said and you smiled as you climbed up onto the motorcycle and wrapped your arms around his waist. 

The breeze felt nice on your face as your hair flew through the wind. For a moment you forgot about all the stress and the worries that gnawed at your heart.

\---

Daryl drove up to what had been a traffic jam. He scouted up a head a bit and as he drove past cars you noticed all the corpses in them. He turned around and made his way back to the RV speaking to Dale a second before making another u-turn to lead them through the graveyard of vehicles. 

Daryl maneuvered again through the cars as the RV followed behind him. As you got deeper into the mist of the traffic you heard a loud noise and turned around to see smoke coming from the RV. It had broken down again, and you sighed as Daryl stopped the bike and the two of you got off it.

Everyone gathered around to asses the damage. Glenn suggested finding parts to fix it and everyone decided to search the cars for any supplies we could find. You took off your bow bag and set it inside the RV before Addison joined you at your side. "I'm gonna search with you and not Ellis," she said and you smiled at her ruffling her hair. "Why's that?" you asked genuinely curious.

"Cause your robin hood and he's a chicken boy," she said and you laughed. The two of you searched through a car and found a half eaten box of cereal bars and an almost empty bottle of ibuprofen. Addie had been glued to your side when you searched around the corpses and you hugged her afterwards and thanked her for being so brave and strong. She smiled through her watery eyes and said she was brave and strong just like you and it made you super happy that she looked up to you. 

You started shuffling through the next car, and this time Addison helped out more seeming less afraid. You pulled out a slim olive green jacket and tried it on over your flannel. "How do I look?" You asked Addie. "Even more like Robin Hood! He's green, too!" you smiled and took the jacket off tying it around your waste. 

"Y/N! Look!" Addie pulled out a pistol and pointed it toward you. "Hey now, put that down you'll hurt somebody." you said as you reached forward and took it from her. "Great find, sweetheart, now Ellis can have a gun of his own." Addie whined, "Why him? He can't hit anything!" you chuckled as you pocketed the gun into the small duffel bag you were carrying. 

Suddenly Rick peered over to you and he told you to get under the cars in a hushed voice. You grabbed Addie and the two of you crawled under a van as you pulled her close to you and put a hand over her mouth. You saw Rick under a different car not to far away and then you spotted Carol, Lori, Carl, and Sophia ducked under cars behind him. 

You looked in the other direction toward where the RV was and saw Ellis and your mother hiding under a car a bit far away. You could tell that Ellis was holding his own hand over your mothers mouth an attempt to keep her quiet. Shane and Glenn were together under a different car and Shane saw you and put a finger over his mouth telling you not to make a sound.

You saw hundreds of feet shuffling toward you and you felt your sister tense up in your arms. A huge herd of walkers started walking past your car occasionally bumping into it. You held Addie even tighter in your arms hoping the strong embrace would comfort her a little. The walkers kept shuffling past you, no end in sight. 

You wondered where the others were. Where they hiding under cars you couldn't see? T-Dog? Dale? Andrea? Where they safe? What about Daryl? You couldn't take losing another person so soon. Especially not someone you were close to. 

Eventually the feet started to thin out as the herd passed. You could no longer hear their groans but you weren't about to risk it. You looked back to Rick when you heard Sophia screaming. She had peeked out too soon and there was a walker trying to grab her. 

Addison cried out muffled by your hand as she saw her friend chased out from under the car by a walker only to be joined by a second one soon after. Rick quickly climbed out from underneath his car and ran after her. 

You let go of Addie and scooted out the car as she followed suit. The two of you ran toward the group that had collected onto the side of the road near the woods that Sophia and Rick had run into. Carol was crying and Lori held her trying to comfort her and stopping her from running after them. 

Ellis grabbed your arm looking over and sighing in relief when he saw that both you and Addie were fine. He held his mothers hand in his own and she refused to look at you. Instead she watched her own feet like there were mini televisions glued to the toes.

\---

Rick had returned without Sophia. Him, Daryl, Shane, and Glenn had left to look for her but when you offered to come along he said he needed you to stay behind with the group. You were one of the few who could hold their own and work a gun so you reluctantly agreed.

Lori had taken Carol into the RV and you stayed with her for a bit letting her cry in your arms. Lori had left to help search cars and it was just the you two and Andrea in the RV. Ellis entered and asked you to help him out with something and you reluctantly agreed leaving Carol in Andrea's care. 

"What is it?" you asked as Ellis lead you over to a couple cars that had already been searched. He stopped and glanced around. "We're alone," you said, "so out with it." He looked at you and then down at his feet before pulling out the gun Addison had found earlier. "Was just wondering if you could teach me how to use this." 

You rolled your eyes. You didn't think he'd be so embarrassed about something like this that he'd lead you out away from the group. The two of you sat down on the road and you pulled out your own firearm to show him how to disassemble and reassemble the gun. He copied your movements and eventually he was able to do it on his own without watching you.

"You're a fast learner," you praised him as you moved onto the next lesson, reloading. You showed him how to eject his magazine and reinsert it in. When he finished doing it himself you taught him how to arm the gun. "You hear that click? There's a bullet in the chamber now. It's ready to fire." He nodded, making his own gun click. 

"Now watch this." You pulled a part of the gun back and forth and it made a clicking noise as it safely ejected the bullet. "That's how you get the bullet out of the chamber." He followed suite and you showed him how to load the bullet into the magazine of the gun. Finally, you taught him how to use the safety. 

"Now I just need to learn to aim." 

"Too bad there ain't a shooting range you can go to any more. Shoulda hung out with me and Dad more."

"About that..." Ellis started, looking anywhere but at you, "I've been meaning to talk to you about that night." You stood up putting your gun away. "You can stop now cause I don't want to talk about why dad did that to Brock." Ellis stood up and grabbed your arm stopping you from walking away. "I already know," he said looking into your eyes, "I already know cause mom told me and I want you to know that I'm glad he's dead. Er- Brock I mean. Not Dad. I would of hit that asshole too had I known."

You looked away, you were starting to cry again. Ellis moved to hug you and hugged back burying your head into his shoulder and letting loose all the pent of frustration from the last few days. Hell, from the last few months. He just held you tighter. 

"I love you, Y/N, don't ever think that ain't true. You're my sister and I'll always love you so damn much."

\---

The sun was starting to set when Rick and Daryl got back without Sophia. They hadn't found her, but they promised to continue looking in the morning. 

Carol cried throughout the night as you held her tight in the bed of the RV. Eventually she cried herself to sleep curled up around you and you snuggled her closer falling into your troubled slumber.

\---

You woke up the next day feeling exhausted but you were determined to help search for Sophia.

Carl had found a bunch of melee weapons and you helped yourself to a slick black Bowie machete and Ellis got a Gerber Mark II which was a pretty neat survival knife. You gave Addison a pocket knife that folded in itself to prevent hurting anyone and you made her promise to only use it during an emergency. "It's NOT a toy, understand?" you asked her and she nodded promising you she wouldn't play with it.

The group got ready to head out and you attached your machete sheath onto your left side. Ellis decided to stay behind with your mother (who was too spaced out to go) and Addison (who was too young to go). You knew Dale would have been able to watch them on his own but you and Ellis didn't trust your mother to be near Addison alone after she attacked you and tried to force your sister to stay at the CDC with her. 

Pulling on your 'Robin Hood' jacket and your quiver, you set out with the others to look for Sophia.

\---

You walked next to Andrea who seemed sore that you had your gun and Carol who held your arm tightly. Andrea was shooting looks at you for packing when she wasn't allowed to. You, unlike Andrea, knew how to use a gun, so Shane didn't take yours away.

Eventually, Daryl spotted a tent in the distance. Rick motioned for everyone to get down so Carol let you go and the two of you got into a crouching position. Daryl, Rick, and Shane scouted ahead and Daryl pulled his knife out and moved toward the tent. He peeked inside and got ready at the door with his knife.

Rick called over to Carol quietly and the two of you made your way over to him. "If she's in there, yours is the first voice she should hear." Rick said. Carol looked over at you and you grabbed her hand giving it a reassuring squeeze. 

"Sophia, sweetie," she called out softly, "Are you in there, Sophia? It's mommy." When there was no response Carol's hand tightened in yours. Rick and Shane moved over by Daryl, their guns ready as he unzipped the tent. He pulled open the tent and disappeared inside. Rick and Shane made to follow him but started coughing and gagging at what must have been a rather nasty smell.

When Daryl didn't immediately return from the tent Carol started calling for him. He emerged from from the tent and told her Sophia wasn't in there. Turned out to be some guy who 'opted out'.

Before anyone could respond to the news the sounds of bells rung out in the distance. Everyone started running toward it hoping Sophia would be at the source. 

\---

The bells led you to a church. You, Daryl, and Shane followed Rick to the entrance and Rick and Daryl opened the door. Inside where 4 walkers sitting at the pews as if they were praying. They turned to look at you and stood up. You took out your new machete and followed Rick to the left. He took out the closest walker and you moved past him and grabbed the other walker by the shoulder before driving the machete in through her chin right into her brain. 

Shane and Daryl took out the 2 walkers in the right pews. You looked around the chapel and frowned when you noticed it was empty. Sophia wasn't here after all, but then what about the bells? 

As if on cue you heard the ringing, and everyone ran out of the building to find it's source which ended up being a megaphone on the side of the building making a fake ringing noise. "I'm going back inside for a bit," Carol said and you followed her into the church. 

You stood at the back of the chapel giving Carol some space. She stayed silent for a moment before starting her prayer. "Father forgive me," she began, "I don't deserve your mercy. I prayed for safe passage from Atlanta and you provided. I prayed for Ed to be punished for laying his hand on me and for looking at his own daughter with whatever sickness was growing in his soul. I prayed you'd put a stop to it, give me a chance to raise her right, help her not make my mistakes." 

You felt uncomfortable listening to Carol when she was so vulnerable. You'd never really believed in a god. Never believed in the power of prayer. When you had problems you knew that no benevolent being was going to help you out. 

But in that moment you found yourself hoping that he was there, that god was real. And you found yourself praying silently yourself for Sophia's safety. And for the safety of your own family. 

"She's so fearful," Carol pleaded, "she's so young in her way. She hasn't had a chance." You felt a tear prickle your eye but you wiped it away. "Praying for Ed's death was a sin. Please, don't let this be my punishment. Let her be safe, alive and safe. Please, Lord. Punish me however you want, but show mercy on her."

Carol was crying now. She sat down next to Lori who wrapped an arm around her. You made your way down the aisle and joined them on Carol's other side. You held her hand and pressed a small kiss to her shoulder comforting her. 

\---

It was starting to get late so Rick, Shane, and Carl where going to keep looking while the rest of you doubled back to the highway and look on the opposite side of the creek. Daryl gave Lori a spare gun he found, and Andrea scoffed dramatically. 

You wished the boys good luck before joining your group as they walked away. 

As you were walking, Lori slowed down to walk next to you. She asked for a quick lesson and you took the gun from her showing her how the safety works and how to fire it if she needed to. 

You saw Andrea roll her eyes and you ignored her. Lori must of saw it too cause she suddenly had an annoyed look on her face. 

"So this is it?" Carol asked as she sat down onto a fallen tree. "This the whole plan?" "I guess the plan is to whittle us down into smaller and smaller groups," Daryl said. "Carrying knives and pointy sticks," Andrea added bitterly before turning to you and Lori, "I see you two have a gun."

"Why you want it?" Lori snapped as she held the gun out to Andrea, "here take it. I'm sick of the looks your giving us." Andrea's mouth was open and she looked like she was shook by what Lori had said. 

Lori sat down and turned to Carol, "Honey, I can't imagine what you're going through, and I would do anything to stop it, but you have got to stop blaming Rick. It is in your face every time you look at him. When Sophia ran he didn't hesitate, did he? Not for a second." 

Carol looked away but Lori continued, "I don't know that any of us would have gone after her the way he did, or made the hard decisions that he had to make, or that anybody could have done it any differently." Carol still wasn't looking at her. "Anybody?" Lori asked, looking up at you and the rest of the group.

You probably wouldn't have ran after her without hesitation. You would of made sure your own family was safe first. That there were no threats nearby to them before going after someone else's daughter. 

Nor could you have stepped up and led the group the way Rick did, the way he continued to. Everyone's eyes where on him, their lives on his shoulder. You already had 3 people you needed to protect and that already proved to be too stressful and difficult. 

Rick was selfless, he was a true leader, and you respected him greatly for it.

"Y'all look to him and then you blame him when he's not perfect," Lori continued after a minute of silence, "if you think you can do this without him, go right ahead. Nobody is stopping you." Andrea stepped forward and to your surprise she handed Lori back her gun. 

"We should keep moving," she said. Lori stood up and moved to the front of the group, everyone else not too far behind.


	7. Lost Souls

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The group continues to search for Sophia.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Double update, this chapter is kinda short so I figured I'd post them both tonight.

Your group continued looking through the woods when they heard a gunshot. Lori had started to panic and you all reassured her that it was fine. You continued looking for Sophia but your mind was racing at what that gunshot must have been. 

Had Rick and the others come across some trouble? Was Carl okay? Did the group lose another kid? You shook your head dispelling the thoughts from your mind. You trusted Rick, you were sure they were fine.

You continued walking for a while, the sun was starting to set. "I think we should call it," Daryl announced and the group agreed. "Pick it up tomorrow?" Carol asked. "Yeah, we'll find her tomorrow," Lori reassured her. 

Daryl whistled to get everyone's attention, and we all started following back to the highway. 

"How much farther?" Lori asked a little while later, still worried about the gunshot from earlier. "Not much, maybe a hundred yards," Daryl told her, "as the crow flies." "Too bad we're not crows." Andrea said as you all continued walking. 

About a minute later you heard her screaming. You spun around to spot her and realized she must have gotten separated from the group but you spared no time running in the direction of the screams. 

You got there just in time to see a stranger on horseback hit the walker with a baseball bat as they rode past Andrea. "Lori? Lori Grimes?" the stranger asked as she stopped the horse infront of your group. 

"I'm Lori Grimes," Lori answered confused. "You need to come with me. There's been am accident, Carl's been shot. He's still alive but you've got to come now." Lori dropped her bag immediately and started walking to the girl. Daryl tried to stop her, "Whoa whoa whoa, we don't know this girl!" he said but it fell on deaf ears.

There was no way Lori was going to take the chance. "Rick said you had others on the highway, that big traffic snarl?" the girl asked, "backtrack to fairburn road, two miles down is our farm. You'll see the mailbox. the name is Greene." she told us and she rode away with Lori. 

You stood there a moment trying to process what just happened when you heard the walker from earlier groan. "Shut up," Daryl snapped as he shot the walker in the head.

\---

"I won't do it. We can't just leave." Carol said. "Carol, the group is split. We're scattered and weak." Dale argued. "What if she comes back and we're not here?" She said and you agreed with her. "We can't leave just yet. Not without Sophia." you said. "If Sophia found her way back and we were gone that would be awful," Andrea said agreeing with you and Carol. 

Daryl nodded. "Okay. We got to plan for this. I say tomorrow morning is soon enough to pull up stakes. Give us a chance to rig a big sign, leave her some supplies. I'll hold here tonight, stay with the RV."

"If the RV is staying, I am too." Dale said. Carol thanked them both. "I'm not leaving either." you said and Andrea agreed to stay, too. "Well, if you're all staying then I'm--" Glenn started but Dale interrupted him. 

"Not you Glenn, you're going to take Carol's Cherokee." He told him. "Me? Why's it always me?" Glenn asked. "You have to find this farm, reconnect with our people and see what's going on. But most important, you have to get the others there." Dale stated.

"This is not an option," he continued, "T-Dog's cut has gone from bad to worse. He has a very serious blood infection. Sandy is in some sort of shock and Addison is too young to stay out here on this highway another night. Get them to that farm, see if they have any antibiotics., because if not, T-Dog will die. No joke."

Dale finished, and looked over to Daryl who walked away to dig into the pouch on his motorcycle. The redneck returned and he chucked Dale's dirty rags at him. "Keep your oily rags off my brother's motorcycle," he said before dropping a bag filled with bottles of pills onto the hood of a car, "why'd you wait till now to say anything? Got my brother's stash." 

He rummaged through the pills, Dale watched with a look of disbelief. You smiled, happy that Merle had been good for something. "Crystal.. X. Don't need that," Daryl muttered to himself before pulling out a bottle. "Some kickass painkillers," he said as he tossed the bottle to Glenn and returned to his pill bag. 

"Oxycycline," he said as he tossed a different bottle to Dale, "not the generic stuff neither. It's first class. Merle got the clap on occasion." You never though you'd say this, but thank god for Merle's clap. That was, however, something you never needed to know. 

You climbed into the RV to check on your family. Addison had fallen asleep on the bed next to your mother and Ellis sat next to them watching them. "Hey," you said and he looked up and smiled at you. "Glad your back," he said, "Addison really missed you."

You sat next to her on the bed and gently brushed her hair out of her face. "I missed you, too, Ellis," you joked and he chuckled lightly. "I did miss you, though," he told you and you smiled.

"How's mom?" you asked and he frowned before looking back at your mother's sleeping form. "Dale thinks she's in shock. I don't know what to do." you saw how worried he looked as he watched her. Ellis had always been close to your mom, in the same way you had been close to your dad. 

You were worried too, you loved your mom, but you knew that Ellis loved her more. You couldn't deny it, no matter how wrong it felt to think such a thing, but you knew that you'd be even more worried if it was your father lying there. 

"She'll be okay," you reassured him and you gave his hand a squeeze. "Glenn is going to take you 3 to a farm a little ways from here, Rick, Shane, and Lori are there. There's a family there, too. Carl was shot but the lady said he was ok so maybe they have a doctor and they can take a look at her."

Ellis nodded, lifting your mother up in his arms as he carried her out the RV. You woke up Addison who shouted your name and jumped up to hug you. You told her what was happening, and promised to see her tomorrow. She promised you she'd be brave like you and protect Ellis and mom.

You grabbed his bag and her backpack and loaded it into the Cherokee before hugging Ellis and Addison goodbye. You bid Glenn and T-Dog farewell before watching them drive away. Carol squeezed you arm and you gave her a sad smile before following her into the RV. 

\---

You held Carol as she cried into your shoulder. Daryl had gotten up and left to look around. Andrea followed him. You wanted to go, too, but Carol needed you here. The thought of someone looking for her out there must have reassured her a little because her sobbing died down and her breathing evened out as she fell asleep. 

You watched the rise and fall of her chest as she slept peacefully, and eventually your eyes grew heavy as you fell asleep beside her. 

That night you dreamt of Addison's 10th birthday party. You made the cake, something you enjoyed doing, and she helped you frost it. Using candy letters you spelt out 'Happy Birthday Addie-Bear!' and you put 10 colorful candles onto the top.

There was a bouncy house and you watched as an older Addison jumped on it with a still young Sophia and Carl. You watched them laughing, having fun. Carol and Lori stood beside you joking and laughing. Lori turned to you and looked down at your belly, "how far along are you?" she asked and you followed her gaze down to see a very pregnant belly. 

"6 months," you said, as if it was the most natural thing in the world. You rubbed your stomach with both your hands, you swore you felt something move. It brought a smile to your face, this thing inside of you.

"Y/N!" you heard someone shout, you turned around to see Amy and Andrea entering the yard through your mothers patio door. She gave you a hug and gasped at your belly, "You're already so big!" 

You smiled as you looked around to see who else had arrived. The whole group was here, even Merle and Daryl had made an appearance. Daryl was making his way toward you and you stepped past Amy to meet him half way.

"Nice party," he said gesturing toward the bouncy house, "the kids are having fun." You smiled and nodded, holding your tummy in a loving manner. Daryl put both his hands on your stomach before leaning forward and giving you a kiss on the cheek.

"Thought about any names?" he asked and you leaned into him as if this was normal for you two. "Milo," you said with a small smile. "Milo Dixon," Daryl said, "I like that."

You smiled looking up at him but reeled back in horror when you saw Brock looking down at you instead. "Too bad you ain't ever gonna get a kid, ain't ever gonna fall in love or get married," he sneered at you, "as if anyone in their right mind would want damaged goods."

You stepped back bumping into Carol and turned to see her sobbing into Lori's arms. She turned to you and you saw that she was covered in blood, "My baby, my little girl she's dead! She's dead!" she hollered in pain. Lori looked you dead in the eyes and said, "Why didn't you follow them? Why didn't you save her?"

You turned toward the bouncy house and in it's placed laid the 3 prone bodies of the children, Addison now back to her original age of 6. Ellis stood over them and he looked over at you accusingly, "you said you'd protect her! She never even got to live past 6!" 

He ran at you as if to attack, and every step he took closer to you transformed him more and more into a mindless walker. "Ellis!" you shouted as you dodged him and backed away. You placed your hand on your stomach but it was now flat, the baby was gone, it was never there to begin with. 

You looked around hoping to find Daryl or Rick, and you did, along with the rest of the group, but they were all walkers now making their way toward you. You were surrounded and you were looking everywhere for a way out when you came face to face with your father.

He was a walker, just like everyone else, but his dead, glossy eyes still pierced into you so hard you couldn't breath. You fell to your knees but you where caught by someone's strong arms. Looking up you saw Brock, terrible, abusive, not dead Brock. 

"If you want to be a mom so bad then I'd be happy to volunteer," he said as he leered over you. His eyes undressing you making you feel small and vulnerable. 

"Y/N" he whispered, and your world started to shake.

You woke up to Daryl whispering your name and shaking your shoulders. You sat up in a panic but calmed down when you realized you were back in the RV. Carol was curled up in the bed next to you, and Daryl was watching you with worried eyes. 

"Were you having a nightmare?" he asked and you nodded your head. "We were celebrating Addison's birthday party but Brock showed up and ruined everything." You told him and he studied your face. "The asshole step-dad?" he asked and you nodded again.

"You were there," you told him and he looked surprised, "you hung out with me while my sister was off playing with Sophia and Carl." You had decided not to mention the part where the two of you were having a baby together, or the loving kiss he had given you on the cheek. 

You were embarrassed to have even dreamt such a relationship with the hunter. Brock was right, you were damaged goods. You had scars both physically and mentally and Daryl knew they were there. Besides, there was just no time for romance when you were constantly running from the dead.

"You should try and sleep again," Daryl said and you agreed. "Thanks for waking me up from that nightmare," you said and you heard him mutter out a welcome. You got comfy in bed again and tried to fall back into a deep slumber.

You thought about the baby dream you were having and your heart felt heavy for the loss of your child who never even existed. Maybe it was because it would never ever exist? Not anymore at least. You wondered how good with kids Daryl would have been. You couldn't imagine him holding a bundle of joy in his arms. 

"...Daryl?" you called out, he didn't respond but you decided to ask him a question anyway. "If you had a kid, what would you name them?" More silence, you almost gave up on waiting for an answer when he finally spoke up. "Bo, maybe, if it was a boy. What about you?" You smiled, "Milo," you told him.

"S'a good name," Daryl said, and you fell asleep feeling happy.

\---

Daryl woke you up again in the morning. Dale, Andrea, and Carol were sitting at the table eating breakfast and you and Daryl joined them. Later you and Andrea sat on top of the RV and she told you to ask Daryl about the itchy butt story.

You laughed just at the name of it, and when Daryl climbed the stairs to join the two of you it was the first thing out of your mouth. He glared at Andrea before telling you the story he had told her that night. 

How he had gotten lost in the woods and survived off berries alone. And how he wiped his butt with poison ivy. His dad was off with some waitress and his brother was in juvie so nobody was out looking for him. When he found his way home he made himself a sandwich none the worse for wear, except his ass itched something awful.

You laughed when he told you that last but, but it still broke your heart to hear that nobody even noticed that Daryl had gone missing. You remembered getting lost in the woods many times as a kid, but unlike Daryl your father was always there for you. 

Everytime you thought you were lost you hugged a tree, and your father always found you before sundown without fail. You couldn't imagine how Daryl must have felt not having that. 

The three of you left supplies on a car and you wrote a sign on the window for Sophia. Daryl got on his motorcycle and looked back at you as you climbed on behind him. 

"I shouldn't even let you ride with me since you laughed at my itchy ass," he said to you and you chuckled. He started up the bike none the less and the two of you started riding off in the direction of the farm, Andrea and Dale following behind you in their own cars. 

You hoped Carl was ok. You hoped Sophia would be found soon. You hoped your mother would forgive you.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the short chapter. I hope you enjoyed it none the less. The next one will be up tomorrow.


	8. The Farm

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Y/N arrives at the farm.

When we arrived at the farm everyone was outside to greet us. "How is he?" Dale asked, voicing the question that you all had been worried about.

"He'll pull through," Lori told us, and you let out a sigh of relief, "thanks to Hershel and his people and-"

"And Shane," Rick interrupted, "we'd have lost Carl if not for him." You looked over to Shane and the first thing you noticed was that he had shaved off all his hair. The second thing you noticed was that he wasn't acting like his usual self. Bobbing his head more and staring at the ground. 

You figured that he must of gone through hell to save Carl.

You gave Rick and Lori both a hug, happy to hear that Carl was okay and sad that they had to go through something so horrible. You then made your way over to the strangers who you assumed where the owners of that farm.

"Hello, I'm Y/N, thank you so much for helping us out," you said as you reached out for a handshake. The man, Hershel, as Lori called him, returned your handshake with a sad smile.

"Y/N? Then that must be your mother that was brought in last night." he said as he held your hand in both of his, "you have nothing to worry about, she was in Psychogenic shock but she'll be just fine."

You nodded, "thank you so much-" you began but he interrupted you. "If you'd like to thank me, then please help us collect stones for the funeral." 

You gave him a sad smile before telling him that you'd be glad to. You met up with Glenn who had also been collecting stones and he told you about Otis. Hershel's friend who got killed by walkers trying to get the equipment to save Carl's life. 

You understood now why Shane seemed off earlier, and you were thankful to this man you never met. He had to have been one of the good ones to risk his life for someone else. 

It was a pity you'd never get to thank him. 

\---

You stood between Ellis and Daryl during the funeral. The Greene's placed rocks on a mound they made in honor of Otis and you listened as Hershel continued to give his speech. 

"We thank you, God, for the peace he enjoys in your embrace. He died as he lived, in grace." Hershel finished. His eyes were filled with sorrow. The Greene girls held each other as they mourned. 

"Shane, will you speak for Otis?" Hershel asked him. 

"I'm not good at it," Shane said as he shook his head avoiding eye contact, "I'm sorry." He continued looking at the ground. You felt bad for him, he had watched a man die. You wondered if he felt guilty. 

"You were the last one with him. You shared his final moments," Patricia, Otis' wife, pleaded. You could tell she was crying by her voice alone. "Please, I need to hear, I need to know his death had meaning."

Shane looked like it hurt to think about it. "Okay," he finally said, bobbing his head around as he looked everywhere but at the mourning family in front of him. 

"We were about done. Almost out of ammo. We were down to pistols by then. I was limping, it was bad. Ankle all swollen up. 'We've got to save the boy' See, that's what he said." Shane looked like he'd seen a ghost.

"He gave me his backpack, he shoved me ahead. 'Run,' he said. 'I'll take the rear I'll cover you.' And when I looked back.." Shane didn't continue, he didn't need to. He limped over to the wheelbarrow, grabbed a rock, and placed in on Otis' grave. 

"If not for Otis, I would have never made it out alive. And that goes for Carl, too. It was Otis. He saved us both."

"If any death ever had meaning, it was his."

\---

You stood next to Hershel as Maggie, the girl on the horse from before, unrolled a map onto the hood of the car. 

"We'll grid the whole area, start searching in teams." Rick started but Hershel forbid him from going anywhere. Not after all the blood he had donated to save his son's life. He forbid Shane from searching, too, because of his ankle.

"Imma head back to the creek, work my way from there." Daryl said, pointing to a spot on the map and moving his finger in the direction he'll be looking.

"I can still be useful," Shane said, "drive up to the interstate, see if she wondered back." \

"I'll search here" you said, pointing toward an area that wasn't looked through yet, "I'll work my way east, then double back and check this strip here. If I leave at the crack of dawn then I should be back before sundown, no sweat."

"Are you sure that's a good idea? It might not be wise to go off by yourself," Rick asked but you shook your head, "I've been alone in the woods many times before, practically lived in them growing up. I'll be fine." you assured him. 

"Why don't you go with Daryl then? It would be safer if you searched together." he said, still not convinced.

"We'll cover more ground this way, Daryl and I are both hunters, we know the woods like the back of our hands. There's nothing to worry about, Rick."

He considered it before nodding, "alright, Y/N, but if you come across any trouble just run."

He waited a moment encase there was anything anyone wanted to add.

"Alright, tomorrow then," Rick finally said, "We'll start doing this right."

"That means we can't have our people out there with just knives. We need the gun training we've been promising them." Shane said, and couldn't ignore the happy look on Andrea's face when he said it.

Hershel, however, didn't seem too happy. "I'd prefer you not carrying guns on my property. We've managed so far without turning this into an armed camp."

"All due respect, you get a crowd of those things wandering in here..." Shane scoffed, taking off his hat. 

"Look, we're guests here, this is your property, and we will respect that." Rick said, shooting Shane a look. He took out his python and placed it on the hood of the car. Shane followed suit with his gun.

Rick looked at you and you nodded pulling out your fathers gun and placing it on the hood of the car as well. 

"First things first," he started, "set camp, find Sophia." 

"Look, I hate to be the one to ask but somebodies got to. What happens if we find her and she's bit?" Shane said leaning forward onto the car. 

You had never even thought of the possibility. You thought maybe you wouldn't find her, maybe she'd be dead, never that she'd be alive but bit. You didn't want to think about it.

"I think we should all be clear on how we handle that." Shane finished. 

Rick was silent for a moment. "You do what has to be done." he told us looking down sorrowfully. 

"And her mother, what do you tell her?" Maggie asked, obviously disturbed by Rick's answer.

"The truth."

Shane grabbed the three guns and you fought the urge to take yours back from him. It was the last thing you had to remind you of your dad. 

"I'll gather and secure all the weapons, make sure no one's carrying till we're at a practice range off site." he said before looking to Hershel, "I do request one rifleman on lookout. Dale's got experience."

Hershel didn't respond. "Our people would feel safer, less inclined to carry a gun," Rick told him and Hershel agreed to it. Rick thanked him and you followed Daryl as he left. 

Daryl went straight to his motorcycle and put his own pistol in the pouch. "I'm gonna go out looking today, I won't go far, be back before dark" he told you.

"Want me to come along?" you asked but he shook his head. "Better off on my own," he said, and you couldn't lie, it kinda hurt. 

"Well, even if you are better off alone, it might still be a good idea to bring somebody else along. Somebody like me." you smiled up at him, and gestured to yourself, "I'm a pretty good person to choose."

He just scoffed, "You're a pretty good pain in the ass, that's what you are."

"Your itchy ass?"

"Now you're definitely not coming."

\---

Addison helped you set up the tent, you were perfectly able to do it yourself but you'd never say no to her when she wanted to help. It probably took twice as long, but it was certainly twice as fun. 

Your mom wouldn't be sleeping in it since she was still recovering in the Greene's guestroom. So you asked Carol to share your tent with your siblings instead. This way Ellis could share the right side with Addison, and you and Carol could take the left. 

You didn't want her to have to sleep alone, not when she was still so distraught. 

You told Ellis that Shane was planning on making a practice range and he was very happy about the idea. 

"Maybe now you can hit actually hit something," Addison teased him and he started fake crying. 

"Why is everyone so mean to me," he wailed and Addie giggled. "You think that's funny?" he asked as he picked her up and started spinning her around.

She playfully screamed and flailed until Ellis set her on top of the makeshift bed. He gave her no time to catch her breath before he started to tickle her. 

"This is what you get for laughing at me," he chuckled as he finally stopped torturing the poor girl. 

"Y/N, help me" she begged in between breathes and you held an imaginary bow and shot Ellis with it. 

He feigned injury, as he plopped down next to a giggling Addie and died dramatically. 

Addison cheered, and the two of you did a victory dance.

\--- 

You caught Daryl on his way out to look for Sophia. 

"I'm on my way to talk to my mother, but I'd be more than happy to not do that if you wan't some company," you asked him but he shook his head.

"Nah, you should just get it over with," he told you and you sighed dramatically.

"Well, good luck then. Stay safe. No talking to strangers and be home before dinner," you said to him and he smiled at you before a worried look came across his face.

"What?" you asked and he looked around before leaning in closer to you.

"Stay away from Shane," he told you and you shot him a confused look.

"Why? What did Shane do?" 

"He lied about Otis, said they were outta ammo, only had their pistols left, but then he said Otis took the rear to cover him. Otis had Rick's python, Shane came back with it." Daryl whispered and your eyes widened in realization.

"Otis couldn't have covered him without a gun. Shane must have taken it, left that man to die." you said and Daryl nodded. 

"Does Rick know?" you asked but Daryl shook his head.

"I think the only reason he hasn't realized it s'cuz he doesn't want." Daryl admitted, and you understood why. Shane and Rick were like brothers. 

"Just stay away from him," Daryl told you and you nodded.

The two of you said goodbye and you made your way to the Greene house, even more on your mind now and dreading the upcoming conversation. 

\---

You stood outside the door wondering if you had any right to even go inside. Inside that room where your mother was, if you had any right to call her your mother. 

Eventually, you had built up enough courage to see her. 

When you opened the door she was still laying in bed. You wondered if you should just come back later, but then you saw her open her eyes to see who had entered. 

She didn't say anything, but she did slowly sit up in bed. You entered the room and pulled a chair up next to her to sit in. 

You noticed the layer of sweat on her, and she looked so exhausted. The two of you sat there, silently, neither of you knowing what to say first.

"I'm sorry," you muttered, "for knocking you out, and dragging you along. I just..." you looked up at her apologetically, she wasn't looking at you. "I just didn't want to lose you. I couldn't and I'm sorry mom but I need you." you chocked up a little on that last bit.

There were tears now, and you sniffled a bit. Your mom still didn't say anything, still didn't look at you.

"I don't know what you want from me. I don't know how to make this right. But I'm sick of this, sick of being hurt by you." You didn't know why your apology turned into an accusation, but you knew it was the truth.

There are some relationships that just can't be mended.

"Before all this, hell even before Dad beat Brock, you've just been pushing me away. Cause Brock always turned me into the bad guy every damn time over every little thing and you believed him."

"You always believed him over me, always. When he raped me I was so terrified thinking you'd blame me for that, too. And maybe it was the shit timing, o-or the fact that I k-knocked you out. But you attacked me, and you went into shock like that." 

You stopped for a moment, finding it difficult to continue, but you had to. You had to end this. 

"Y-you... I want so badly for you to just hold me, a-and love me like you did when I was a kid. But I know now that I'm not gonna get that. I know that now, Sandy."

"And I'm glad Dad got Brock killed, I'm glad he's dead. A-and I'm glad I forced you to live. Cause I know you ain't ever gonna be my mom again but you got Addison yet. And she's only 6 and she needs you."

You looked up at your mom again, she still wasn't looking at you. You wondered if she was even listening. 

Standing up, you grabbed her shoulder and used your other hand to grab her chin forcing her to look at you. "She needs you, dammit. She's only 6 fucking years old and she can't lose her mother like this."

"Do you have any idea how scared you're making her? How worried she is about her damn mother? I'll grant you 1 damn wish, I'll leave you alone. I won't talk to you anymore. When you come back to the tent I won't sleep there."

"But mark my fucking words, if you ever try and hurt her, if you ever try and kill her again like you did at the CDC, I'll grant your 2nd damn wish and I'll put you out of your misery." 

"I'll leave you alone, but don't think for a second that I won't be watching you Sandy." you finished, she was crying now, her tears rolled down her face onto your hand. 

You let go of her and turned to leave. When you got to the door you heard her crying out your name but you didn't stop. You left the room, you left the house, hell you left the farm. 

Only once you were protected by the seclusion of the trees did you stop. Falling to your knees and releasing the breath you didn't know you were holding. You started sobbing, a horribly ugly sob like when you had lost Amy. Sweet, innocent Amy.

Pulling out your machete, you held your hair like a ponytail and sliced it off, the remaining hair falling into an uneven bob. You had felt like doing it for a while, your hair was getting annoying and you weren't quite ready to start braiding it yourself. 

Besides, today was the day of doing things you'd later regret. 

Today was the day you lost your mother, you had threatened to kill her, no matter how empty it was. You knew that you'd never be able to actually do it. You couldn't kill another living human being, especially not one you loved so god damn much. 

Even if she didn't love you back. 

\---

Carol ran her fingers through your now short hair. When you returned from the woods you immediately went looking for Lori. She cut your hair short for you, and now the only long hair you still had was your bangs, which only halfway came down your face but was still relatively long compared to the rest of your hair. 

"I like it, you look hot," she told you and you smiled. You had told Carol earlier about your interaction with your mom... well... with Sandy...

She held you when you started to cry again, and you were grateful to have her. The two of you were originally planning on sleeping in the tent with Ellis and Addie, but now that it was no longer your tent she suggested that we sleep in the RV instead. 

You helped Carol clean the RV to make it feel homier. She wanted it ready for Sophia, and you weren't one to argue. 

Later, you laid beside her as she was patching a hole in a blanket. You were about to doze off when you heard the door opening. 

You turned your head to see who it was and saw Daryl walking inside with a piece of straw in his mouth. It made him look even more like a redneck than he already did, if that was even possible. 

You returned to your original position and closed your eyes, hoping a nap would make you feel better. 

"I cleaned up. Wanted it to be nice for her," you heard Carol say beside you. 

"For a second I thought I was in the wrong place." 

Then silence, followed by a quiet clink of something being set down.

"A flower?"

"It's a Cherokee Rose." 

You wondered if you heard right, Daryl didn't seem like the kind of guy who brought pretty ladies flowers. Turning over, you sat up and rubbed the sleep out of your eyes. You were so damn tired. You wondered if this was a dream, but sure enough, there was a single flower in a beer bottle on the table. 

Carol wrapped her arm around you pulling you closer and you rested your head on her shoulder closing your eyes again.

"The story is," Daryl started, "that when american soldiers were moving Indians off their land on the trail of tears the Cherokee mothers were grieving and crying so much 'cause they were losing their little ones along the way from exposure, and disease, and starvation." 

"A lot of them just disappeared. So the elders, they said a prayer. Asked for a sign to uplift the mothers' spirits, give them strength and hope. The next day this rose started to grow right where the mother's tears fell."

"I'm not fool enough to think there's any flowers blooming for my brother. But I believe this one bloomed for your little girl."

You heard Carol sniffle, you knew she was crying again. You had never realized how sweet Daryl really was.

"She's gonna really like it in here," he told her before leaving the RV.

You sat up more and wrapped your arm around her as she buried her head into your shoulder. "Where was Daryl when I was young and single?" she asked and you laughed.

"Well, you're single now ain't ch'ya?" you said, making her smile. 

"What, not young?" she asked and you put both your hands up in mock surrender. "Young enough, and still beautiful." you said making her smile even more. 

"I won't steal him away from you," she joked and playfully glared at her. 

"I'm not the one he's bringing flowers to!" you told her in an attempt to defend yourself.

"I'm not the one who was cuddling with him at the CDC." She said as she nudged you. 

Carol laughed when you started blushing and you buried your face in her pillow. 

\---

You found Daryl at his tent when you went looking for him. You gave a small hey when you entered, zipping the door shut behind you.

"I like your haircut," he said and you thanked him, your hand instinctively going to your head.

"I just wanted to stop by, say hey, I probably won't see you tomorrow before I go since I'm leaving at the butt crack of dawn." you told him and he nodded. 

"How'd things go with you mom?" he asked and you sighed, sitting down next to him.

"Well, long story short, she's not my mom anymore. I promised her I'd leave her alone." 

"M'sorry," he said, shooting you a sad look.

"Got nothing to be sorry for," you whispered and you laid your head on his shoulder. He tensed at first, but relaxed so you didn't pull away.

"I was always afraid this would happened, even before the walkers came, but it doesn't matter how prepared I was, still hurt like hell." you told him, and he wrapped his arm around you to comfort you.

"It's her loss, you tried to make amends. She's just too stupid to see it." he told you and you nodded, trying hard not to cry again. You had already cried twice today, you refused to cry a third time. 

You and Daryl sat like that for a while, silently enjoying each others company.

Eventually Daryl moved away. "Don't fall asleep in my bed again, girl," he said and you laughed as you got up and made your way to the door. 

"Don't miss me too much while I'm gone," you joked and you failed to catch the blush on his face as you exited his tent. 

It was going to be a long day tomorrow.


	9. Meet Me In The Woods

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Y/N searches for Sophia in the woods.

Bow? Check. Quiver? Check. Machete? Check. Gun? You pulled your fathers pistol out of the gun bag and stuck it in your waistband. Check. Anything else you might need? Perhaps Ellis' super cool survival knife that he just so happen to leave in the RV?

He probably won't miss it. Probably. 

Now that your armed to the teeth, you're ready to go searching the woods. Carol packed you some water bottles and a can of beans for lunch so your ready to go. The only person who's awake this early in the morning is the person on watch.

Which just so happens to be.... Daryl?

"Hey, Daryl," you greeted, as you closed the RV door and smiled up to the man on top of it. "Please tell me you haven't been awake all night." 

"Nah, just woke up, thought I'd take morning watch before I leave," Daryl said as he got up and climbed down the RV ladder. "You leaving already? Should eat something first." 

"I've got beans for later, I'll be fine," you reassured him. He didn't look very convinced. "I promise, I'll be a-okay! I already promised Rick that if I see a herd I'll run. And you know I know the woods well! We've hunted together before."

"Yeah, you're a shit tracker," he mumbled and you glared at him.

"What I lack in tracking I make up for in other areas," you told him. He raised his eyebrow at that, seemingly unconvinced. 

"It's true! I'm very fast," you argued. 

"You're right, that's definitely more useful than tracking." he said sarcastically. 

"I'm great with a bow!" 

"Can't find nothing to shoot it with."

"I'm extremely good looking," you joked and he laughed at it.

"That ain't gonna help you in the woods, girl, and if anything it'll make the walkers want ta eat you more," he said, clearly amused by the idea.

You looked him dead in the eyes, your face the most serious face in the history of serious faces. "I can climb a motherfucking tree." You told him.

"Wow, a whole tree?" he asked, pretending to be impressed. "Anyone can climb a tree, Y/N."

"Not as good as me, I'm the best damn tree climber alive. I'll out climb you any day, Dixon. Don't test me." 

He laughed again, holding his hands up in surrender. "Okay, you win. What you lack in tracking you make up for in your amazing tree climbing skills."

"And don't you ever forget it!" You said, satisfied with your small victory. "Now if you'll excuse me, Daryl, I got places to be."

His smile fell and he looked at you like he wanted to say something. "Just be careful, okay?" he asked and you put your hand on his shoulder, trying to ignore the way he tensed at first before relaxing under your touch.

"I promise, Dixon, this won't be the last you'll see of me."

He still looked like he wanted to say something, but you couldn't stand around forever and wait for him to say it. You had to go, and so you gave Daryl's shoulder a comforting squeeze before you turned and walked away.

You'd be back later, so would Daryl. Hopefully, one of you would have Sophia.

\---

The woods were no longer as relaxing as they use to be. Not when there were dead people wandering around them looking to eat you. 

You hadn't ran into any of them yet, even with your constant calling of Sophia's name. Nobody replied, dead or alive. Eventually you came up to a home. Not quite a farmhouse, due to the lack of barns or, well, a farm. 

Just a house, in the middle of nowhere. 

A house that you, personally, would totally hold up in if you were a lost girl in the woods. 

You scanned the area around the house for any signs of life. Having found none, you made your way to the front door.

"Should I knock? No... that doesn't really seem necessary. Walkers can't answer doors." you muttered and you grabbed the doorknob and tried to turn it. Locked. 

"Dammit," you cursed, trying to jiggle the handle open. It wouldn't budge, so you decided to try the backdoor. 

The backdoor was unlocked, thank god. You opened it wide and grabbed your bow, readying an arrow. "Hello? Anybody home? Sophia?" you called. 

You waited a minute, and when nothing answered you ventured further into the house. The back hall led into the living room, which was empty. The room itself looked pretty clean, no blood or dead people or anything. 

The neat white furniture reminded you of your friend Lacy's house. She had been the only friend you really had, most people in your small town thought you were a weirdo. 

You remembered coming over to her house after spending the day camping. You were covered in dirt and she refused to let you in. 

You had walked around her house, making monster noises and tapping on the windows as she locked them. You laughed remembering how she had snuck up behind you with the hose. 

It had turned into a water fight that left you both soaked. You had to borrow some of her clothes. 

You understood the phrase "ignorance is bliss." Lacy and her wife where alive and well, and enjoying their honeymoon in Italy. Nobody could convince you otherwise. 

You snapped out of your thoughts when you heard the floor creaking upstairs. Someone was in the house. 

You spotted the stairs by the doorway that led to the kitchen. You quietly walked up them, trying your hardest not to make a sound. Eventually, you made it to the top. 

There was 2 rooms to the left, one to the right. Left first, that's where you think you heard the sound. You knew you couldn't open the door and ready your bow at the same time so you put the bow back into it's place on the quiver and pulled out the survival knife. 

With your knife ready in one hand, you reached over and turned the knob opening the door. 

The room was empty, and it looked to have been a teenagers room. You searched for any signs of someone recently being here but there was nothing. Sighing, you exited the room, closing the door behind you.

You went over to the next door and grabbed the door knob as you took a deep breath. You turned the knob and swung the door open as the walker inside turned to look at you. Before it could even register your presence you had sunk the knife into it's head killing it. 

You pulled the knife back as it fell to the ground and immediately surveyed the room for anymore walkers. Nothing. You wiped the knife on your jeans and put it back into it's sheath. 

You searched this room, too, for any signs of Sophia. Thankfully, there were no signs of anyone having been here. That walker probably owned this house. And from the looks of it this probably was her room. 

You left the room, again closing the door behind you, and made your way down the hall to the last room. You readied your knife again and turned the knob as you swung the door open. 

The odor hit you life a wave and you almost threw up. You lifted up your shirt to cover your face as you stepped into the room and looked for any threats. There weren't any but there was the body of a man who 'opted out'.

You were about to turn and leave when you noticed the gun holster on the man's corpse. That would come in real handy. It would be easier to draw your gun from a holster than from your pants. 

You wondered if this was considered grave robbing. You also wondered if it was morally acceptable to steal from a corpse. It's not like they could use it anymore. 

Would Carol take it? Probably not. You knew for a fact Lori wouldn't. Shane definitely would. Rick already had a holster so he probably wouldn't. 

Daryl would take it, you were sure of that. You wished he was here so he could get it for you and then you'd have the holster and you wouldn't of had to go in that damn room. 

And oh my god did you want that holster. You wanted it so bad. You were jealous of Rick's holster and now here was one of your own. You just needed to get it off this dead guy. 

Your mind was made up, you were going in. 

Breathing out of your mouth, you slowly walked into the room. You nudged the corpse to see if it was alive but it certainly wasn't. You crouched down and undid the straps of the holster. 

Shit, it was attached to the belt. "I'm sorry," you whispered to the dead man before you undid his belt, sliding it out to free the holster. "Thanks." 

You were about to turn and leave when you realized that he probably had a gun to go with the holster. You found said gun on the ground next to him. He probably dropped it when he... died.

You turned around to leave when you saw a beautiful sniper rifle leaning on the wall be the door. You grabbed it and exited the room, shutting the door behind you. 

You took a deep breath of fresh, non-death soaked air, and made your way back downstairs. 

You searched the cabinets in the kitchen and found the motherlode of canned goods. Certainly more than you could carry, so you mentally marked this place down to ransack later. 

For now you grabbed some canned peach slices to eat with your beans. 

You noticed a door in the kitchen that lead to what you assumed must have been the pantry. You had already searched every other room in the house, including the bathroom that was attached to the living room. 

You went over to the pantry door and tried opening it but it was jammed. You jiggled it and pulled it and eventually the door swung open, and the walker inside fell out right on top of you.

You shrieked as you the surprise weight of a teenage walker made you fall to the ground. You grabbed it's shoulders before colliding on the floor keeping it from biting you as your head spun from hitting the tile so hard. 

The kid walkers teeth were so close to your face as it leaned forward, the only thing stopping it from biting you was your grip on it's shoulders. You positioned both your legs up to help you get out of it's reach way faster before you used all your strength to shove the walker off.

Pushing away with your legs you managed to scramble back and get off the ground, your hand grabbing your bow in just a split second thanks to the muscle memory. You pulled back your arrow and sunk it into the walkers eye before it even had time to fully recover from the shove. 

You stood there for a few minutes, trying to catch your breath and calm your heartbeat after your near death experience.

You knew you still had to check the pantry. No stone unturned. So you put away your bow and grabbed your knife as you stepped forward to look inside the small room.

No signs of Sophia. No surprise. 

\---

Ah, beans. It has bean forever since you last had some. And with the added addition of the delicious, juicy peaches, this was truly a nice lunch. 

After you had searched the house you continued east through the woods. You then doubled back a bit before taking a different route to the farm. Half way home, you started feeling hungry so you stopped in a clearing to settle down and eat your beans.

You probably had maybe an hour or two left of sunlight. Plenty of time to eat. If your calculations were correct, the farm was only about 45 minutes away. 

You wondered what everyone was up to today. Was Carol alright? Had your mom gotten out of bed? How were Ellis and Addison? Maybe Shane had set up the firing range and taught him a few things. 

Maybe they looked around for Sophia, too. Maybe they went back to the highway and checked there. Maybe they found her. Maybe Daryl did. 

If you had to place your money anywhere it would be on him. He was an expert tracker. And he cared a lot about finding her. He was a good man.

He hadn't been before, you remember thinking he was just the quieter more rational racist asshole that his brother was. Though you enjoyed hunting with him, he always seemed like he didn't give a shit about anybody but him and Merle.

The man you thought he was then wouldn't have brought Carol that flower. Or spent so much time and energy looking for her little girl. He wouldn't of comforted you when Amy died or talked to you late at night when you felt troubled. You had never judged somebody so wrong. 

You felt bad for ever thinking he was anything like Merle. Now, you wondered how they were even brothers when they were so different. You found yourself missing Daryl more than you probably should. 

You didn't want to think about what that meant, or how deep your feelings for the hunter went. Everytime you did you could hear Brock's voice in the back of your head. 

You were out of beans. And maybe because it was the only thing you ate all day, or because it was just some beans and peaches, but you were still pretty hungry. 

You got up and gathered all your things. All 3 of your guns, your 2 bladed weapons, and your bow and arrow. You were certainly armed and ready. You started making your way back to camp when you heard a gunshot.

Coming from the direction of the farm. 

Before you fully realized what your body was doing, you had already started sprinting as fast as you could through the woods. You maneuvered through trees and dodged the low hanging branches as your mind raced with all the possible scenarios that could be going wrong.

You didn't know how long you ran for, you could hear your heart thumping in your chest. You had to be close. 

You tripped over a root and landed on your right side hard. You stood up the best you could resting on a tree trunk. 

You had a few cuts on arms and a long bruise that ran down your whole leg. You had bent your ankle in an uncomfortable way but thankfully it wasn't swelling up so it probably wasn't sprained. Though, it did make it hurt to walk but you had to get to the farm.

You steadied yourself, taking out what was left of your last water bottle and chugging it before putting it back in your bag and running towards the farm.

\---

When you arrived at the farm the sun was already starting to set. 

You were exhausted, and you were hurt, but you had no time to rest. There was nobody outside, not that you could see. The silence was eerie, and only amplified your worry. 

You ran up the porch of the farmhouse and swung the door open. "Ellis? Addison?" You shouting, hoping your group was ok, "Daryl? Rick?"

You barged into the dining room and you where met with everyone looking bewildered at you. Everyone but Daryl, who wasn't there. Hershel shouted something about your guns, and before you had the chance to ask about Daryl Rick was already pushing you out the house.

"Y/N, Y/N calm down," Rick said as he grabbed both your arms looking you in the eyes, "what's wrong? Talk to me."

You hadn't even realized that you were hyperventilating. The exhaustion from running all the way here was finally settling in, and the whole right side of your body was throbbing in pain.

"There was a gunshot, I heard a gunshot, Rick." you chocked out, as you struggled to catch your breath. 

"It's alright, everyone's find just breath," Rick said and you tried to focus on your breathing. Rick took your pack from you, and grabbed the guns to add to the stash in the RV. 

"Andrea shot Daryl with the rifle, but she thought he was a walker and she missed. He only got a scratch. He's fine, he's resting upstairs." Rick told you and you nodded, trying to process this.

"How the hell did she mistake him for a walker?" you asked, it just didn't make any sense to you.

"He got hurt in the woods, he was covered in blood and he was limping, but don't worry he's fine." Rick told you and you felt bad for not going with him. You could of been there to help him, but you stupidly thought it would be better to search different areas.

"Can I see him?" you asked, and Rick nodded, placing your stuff on the porch and leading you back inside the house.

Ellis and Addison had been waiting by the door. You engulfed them both in a hug, squeezing tightly despite the protests from your bruised side. After assuring them that you were fine they left to go finish eating and you made your way up the stairs with Rick to see Daryl.

You passed Carol in the hall who gave you a sad smile and a hug before she made her way downstairs and Rick opened the door to Daryl's room for you. 

When you entered Daryl had his back to you and you gasped when you saw the scars. He whipped around when he heard it quickly covering himself with the blanket. 

Rick closed the door behind you, giving you two some privacy, but neither of you said anything. Eventually, you moved to sit on the foot of the bed.

"Hey," he muttered. He looked up at you before looking down again.

"You have no idea how relieved I am to see your ok, Daryl," you told him, watching him as he glanced up at you again still holding the blanket to his chest. 

"M'fine," he muttered as he finally looked up at you. He looked like shit, his head wrapped up and bags under his eyes. You wondered how bad the wound was. Would it leave a scar? Like the ones on his...

"How'd you get those scars?" you asked, and you immediately regretted it when he glared at you.

"The fuck you care for? I don't need your pity." he snapped and you were taken back a bit.

"It's not pity-"

"The hell it isn't. I know what you think of me. You all think I'm just fucking dirty redneck trash!" he shouted at you and you felt your eyes start to tear up.

"Daryl, no-"

"Get the hell out of here, I'm so sick of you pestering me all the damn time. Leave me the hell alone, bitch." he hissed before laying down and pulling the blanket up to his chin. You felt like you were about to cry but no tears fell. Standing up, you made your way to the door. 

"I'm sorry," you whispered as you opened the door and left, closing it softly behind you. 

Not a single tear escaped you. You were too exhausted to cry.


	10. A Painted Rock's Worth

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Y/N is stuck in bed all day. She is not happy.

When you awoke in the RV you were alone. You weren't surprised by this, but a small part of you had wished to wake up beside the comforting warmth of somebody next to you. 

When you sat up your right side screamed in protest. It was now worse then when you had initially fell. Apparently, running on it doesn't help. Hershel told you to spend the day in bed, but your head was racing too much to follow his orders.

You had to get up and do something to distract yourself from this feeling that has been gnawing at your heart. It had appeared 2 days ago after your conversation with your mother. It had increased tenfold after last nights conversation with Daryl.

Daryl, where the two of you ever even friends? You enjoyed talking to him, you missed him when he was away. You even came to terms with your feelings toward him, even though you knew you'd never act on them. 

Maybe Daryl never saw it as a friendship. Maybe he was just too nice of a guy to tell you to leave. You suddenly felt guilty for wasting so much of his time.

The RV door opened ripping you from your destructive thoughts, and you smiled at Ellis as he entered and made his way over to you. 

"Hey, Clumsy. Feeling any better?" he asked as he sat down on the bed next to you. 

"No," you mumbled as you shifted a little to better face him. The movement sent pain down your side.

"Need help getting up? I'll make sure you don't trip and destroy your left side." he joked and you glared up at him.

"You wanna help me, punk? Hand me your knife," you said and Ellis shot you a confused look before pulling out his survival knife and handing it to you. 

"You gonna steal it again?" he asked as you scooted over to the side of the bed and pulled out your machete from your bag.

"No, no I'm gonna trade you," you muttered as you scooted back over to him and handed him the machete. 

"Sweet, a big guy like me needs a bigger knife anyway," he cheered as he inspected his new weapon, "and your small so-OUCH! Stop pinching me!"

\---

Your side was murdering you, slowly but surely. You wondered for a second if you should have listened to Hershel when he said to stay in bed, but your sister wanted to play outside and Ellis went off to the shooting range with the majority of the group.

Addison had wanted to go and learn to shoot too, but she was far to small. Instead, Maggy had given you a couple rolls of duct tape, so the two of you were doing some arts and crafts.

You taught her how to make a duct tape rose, and so she had gathered pencil length sticks to turn into a duct tape boutique. "You'll want a strip 2 inches long.. just like that. Goodjob. Now fold it like this," you instructed as she copied your folds and added her pedal to the stick stem. 

"Perfect!" you praised her as she giggled showing off the beginnings of a rose. "You're getting the hang of this!"

"Thanks!" she glowed, and her smile brightened your entire world. "I'm gonna give it to Beth!" she told you and you smiled. She was always making things for others, and you knew Beth and Patricia had been let Addie help them with farm work as they looked after her. You were thankful for their kindness. 

"I bet she'll love it!" you said as you continued folding little petals for the roses. 

"I'll make one for Daryl, too! He is sad so this will make him happy," she said and you felt your stomach drop. It was rather pathetic, you thought, to feel upset at the mere mention of his name. 

You were going to see him around a lot, it was inevitable. You had to get over it, but it hurt like a bitch. 

"I'm sure he'll love it," you told her. Looking down at your pedals as you made more for Addie. "You should give it to him for me, he likes you," Addie said and you gave her a sad look. 

"He doesn't like me, Addie," you sadly muttered but Addie just puffed out angrily. "Yes he does, your just olivius," she argued as she continued building up the flowers.

"Olivius?" you asked quirking your eyebrow up at her. "Yeah, Ellis says it means that you don't see things that everyone else sees." she said matter of factly.

"Oh... oblivious."

"That's what I said, olivius!"

You pouted at Addie, "I'm not oblivious. There's nothing there to see." you argued but Addie just giggled. "Suuuuure~~," she teased. 

"Brave words, from someone so ticklish," you threatened as you pounced on her tickling at her sides. She squealed and squirmed laughing and shrieking, and you ignored the shooting pain at your side from the movement.

"Y/N!" you heard between Addie's pleas for mercy and you stopped your tickle attacks to look and see who called you.

It was Hershel, who made his way over to you from the stables where he had been working. "I thought I told you to stay in bed," he scolded as he stood infront of you. 

"I needed a break," you pleaded but he crossed his arms not buying it. 

"The bruises should be fine, but you put too much strain on your ankle. Your lucky it isn't sprained, you need to stay off it for at least a full day. Maggie and Glenn are going to look for some crutches on their run today but you can't walk till then, understood?"

You nodded your head, embarrassed for being scolded by Hershel. He helped you up and assisted you to the RV where you laid back down and that damn bed. 

Addie had followed with the duct tape crafts and the two of you had to finish them in the RV. 

In the end, Addison had made a beautiful boutique of roses held in a small vase that Patricia had given her. She had 5 gift roses for Patricia, Beth, Carol, Daryl, and?

"Who's this last rose for?" you asked as you finished writing the names on the other 4. 

"You," she said making you smile, "to make you happy, too." You were touched, your sister was an angel.

"Thank you, Sweetheart. Nothing makes me happier than hanging out with you, though," you told her and she carefully hugged your left side. "Now why don't you go deliver those roses and see what Beth is up to?"

She nodded, giving you a peck on the cheek, before shouting out an "I love you" as she ran out the RV, roses in hand.

\---

You had tried napping, but settled for staring up at the ceiling instead. "Only one day..." you muttered as you let out a sigh. You tried to think back to your life before the apocalypse, to all the moments with Lacy or your dad. 

It was beginning to be a difficult task, if felt like such a long time ago. 

You did recall one memory, a sad one however. It was after your brother stopped coming over to your dads with you. He had gotten into music so your dad bought him a guitar. He never had the chance to give it to him. 

You remember waking up parched in the middle of the night and you left your room to get some water. You found your father in the living room holding up the guitar. You knew he was crying.

You tried to remember a happier time but your broken heart kept going back to the sad memories. You remembered one time at your mothers when you had gotten into a pretty nasty fight with Brock. 

He had drank a lot that night, and you were heading out to a party that a coworker had invited you to. You were never much for parties, but you were in your prime and you wanted to become more social.

You had learned to braid hair that night, and you looked amazing. You wore a crop top you had bought for this very occasion and you were so damn excited. It didn't last long. 

Your mom had been at the store with a 4 year old Addie. Ellis was at work. Brock stopped you from leaving calling you a slut for dressing like that. You had tried to shove past him, to leave, but he gripped your arm so bad it bruised. 

He had thrown you to the ground and hollered at you to go to your room but you were a legal adult and he wasn't your father. 

When you had tried to get up and walk past him he snapped and smashed his bottle of beer above you drenching you in alcohol and raining glass down on you. You didn't move out of the way on time and he slashed at you, successfully cutting you deep enough to scar.

You traced that very scar on your stomach with your hands as you continued to stare at the ceiling. Your eyes weren't wet, you had nothing left to cry. You felt so sorrowful. You hated laying here, drenched in despair. 

You just wanted to get up and go outside. To walk through the woods, your bow in hand. To breathe that fresh air and feel that sun on your face. You'd be able to feel happy then, you'd be able to love yourself again. 

Much like before, the sound of someone entering the RV tore you from your thoughts. This time it was Rick. 

"Back from target practice?" you asked and he nodded as he put the bag of guns away. 

"Your brother is approving, he hit a few targets today," he told you and you smiled up at him. "I'm glad," you said and Rick stood in front of the bedroom doorway.

"How are you feeling?" he asked and you sighed. "I'd rate it a 4 out of 10. I'll be up before you know it," you answered, trying not to look as sad and tired as you felt.

"Those were some nice guns you found yesterday. Want to learn how to fire a sniper rifle?" he asked and you instantly brightened up.

"Yes! I'd absolutely love to!" you enthusiastically replied and Rick chuckled. "Well, tomorrow we'll get you outta bed and I'll set you up a practice range." he told you and you felt like a kid on Christmas Eve. 

\---

Addison had returned later that day with a barbie doll. Apparently it had belonged to Beth, but she had given it to your little sister since she was far too old for toys. Your sister had barged in and told you she wanted it's hair done so you brushed and braided the doll for her. 

You had tried teaching Addison braids before, back when the world was normal, but she hated doing them herself. You became her designated hair stylist, braiding things from doll hairs to her and her friends hairs during slumber parties.

You always wondered how you could be so unpopular with people your age when kids always seemed to think you were the coolest.

Addison got off the bed to leave with the doll when you called out to her to wait. 

Earlier, Carol has returned your fairy charm to you that she found in your pants pocket when she was doing laundry.

Your first instinct was to give it to Daryl to help him recover quicker, and for goodluck when he goes looking again, but you didn't think Daryl wanted to talk to you yet so you came up with this master plan.

"Addie, did Daryl like the rose you gave him?" you asked and she smiled. "He loved it! He would have loved it more coming from you," she replied. You chose to ignore that last bit. 

"I have something I want you to give to Daryl. I'd do it myself but I'm stuck in bed," you lied, "and I think he'd like it more coming from you." you told her as you handed her the charm.

"Don't tell him it's from me, okay?" you asked her and she nodded, "okay!" she said before running out of the RV, charm in one hand and doll in the other. 

\---

The rest of your day wasn't so bad. Carol and Ellis ate supper with you, and the three of you joked around for a while, nobody having anyplace particular to go. Ellis bragged about his 'amazing' new gun skills and you and Carol kept teasing him about it.

Eventually Carol left to go see if Shane and Andrea were back from their search.

And about an hour later Ellis left to go see if Addison was still playing secret agents.

Again, you were left alone with your thoughts. Except this time you were in a much happier mood. Addison, Ellis, Carol, and Rick had all brightened your day making you feel less sorrowful and upset.

Now, you were able to fill your mind with happy memories. Like that time a couple of kids at school convinced Addison that unicorns weren't real, and Addison had locked herself in the bathroom crying about it. 

You and Ellis had tracked down a lady who the two of you remembered having a 'real' unicorn at the Renaissance Fair when you were children. She didn't live far away at all, so you and Ellis convinced Addison to come outside because you knew where to find an actual unicorn. 

Ellis drove to the farm, and the lady was waiting at the entrance with the unicorn by her side. Addison was literally bouncing with joy. She had her picture taken and she had gotten to ride it. She said it was the best day of her life.

Or the time you were up in West Virginia for a summer camping trip with your dad. You had taken a walk to refill the cooler with water when you saw something huge fly above you. 

You had gotten a decent look at the creature, and you swear it was Mothman. Your father didn't believe you, he just ruffled your hair and said "Nice try, sweetheart, but your old man isn't afraid of a giant pretend bug."

Later you heard him screaming as he came running back from the bathroom looking like he had seen a ghost. Turns out he saw Mothman himself on his way back, and he would always tell the story at parties and later camping trips with much more drama and suspense as you tried to hold in your snickers.

He never mentioned the part where he ran away screaming.

For the third time, you were pulled from your thoughts by someone entering the RV. This time you felt rather disappointed since the memories had been of such happy times.

You saw Daryl, to your surprise, closing the door behind him as his eyes landed on you. "Carol isn't here," you told him.

"I know," he said, "Was just talking to her outside." Daryl entered the small bedroom and paused for a moment before pulling something out of his pocket and handing it to you. 

It was a smooth rock with a dog's face painted on it. You looked at Daryl confused. "What?" you asked, not quite what you wanted to say but all you could muster.

"Addison said you liked dogs," Daryl muttered and you felt your heart skip. Was this Daryl trying to apologize? You looked down at the dog rock and felt your cheeks warm up. 

"M'sorry bout yesterday," Daryl apologized and you smiled up at him. 

"No, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have brought up your scars." you said shooting Daryl an apologetic look. 

"It's not that, when I was in the woods I saw my brother."

"Your brother? Where is he, is he okay?"

"He wasn't really there, i was just hallucinating. But he was saying shit like how everyone thought bad of me and he said you-" Daryl paused, looking down at his hands.

"What did he say about me?" you asked, concern clear on your face.

"Said you didn't care 'bout me," he muttered and you chuckled. He looked up at you confused and you gave him a look of disbelief. 

"Daryl, I body slammed the ground trying to get my ass back to camp to make sure you were okay. I heard that gunshot and assumed the worst. I was worried about my family and that includes you and Carol."

Daryl gave you a small smile, "was stupid to listen to him, I felt bad the second you left." he told you and patted the bed beside you. 

He hesitated a moment before sitting down, and you grabbed his hand and squeezed it. "There's something I wanna show you, but I've never shown this to anyone so you gotta keep it a secret, okay?" you said and he nodded while muttering an okay.

You lifted up your shirt high enough to reveal your tummy so that he could see the scars that your stepdad had given you. "There are some on my thighs and my lower back, too," you told him, "most of them are from broken beer bottles. Some are from a knife."

Daryl looked at your stomach with a expression that could only be described as furious. "Yer stepdads lucky he's already dead. He got off easy." he said as you lowered your shirt.

"I'm just glad he's gone," you muttered and he shifted awkwardly on the bed. 

"My dad, he was a drunk, too," he said and you looked up to see him watching you. His eyes were such a beautiful blue color, you wondered why you never noticed how attractive they were before. 

"When he was pissed he'd take off his belt and beat the shit out of Merle, and when Merle left he started beating the shit out of me instead." he told you and you stroked his hand with your thumb.

"Where was your mom?" you asked, and Daryl tightened his grip. "She died when I was little," he said and you remembered the story he told you back at the highway. 

When he had gone missing in the woods and nobody was looking for him. It broke your heart. 

You shifted in the bed ignoring the pain and sat next to Daryl cuddling up closer to him. He relaxed right away snaking his arm around you pulling you in closer. You rested your head on his shoulder feel comfortable and content.

"For what it's worth, I'm glad I have you here," you whispered as your eyelids grew heavy. Your mind no longer raced, your heart no longer felt uneasy. Sleep crept up on you like a predator and the world grew dark.


	11. Last One Out

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So sorry for the hiatus, I've been busy lately but that's all done with so I now have plenty of free time to continue this story. Please enjoy!!

When you awoke you weren't alone for once. You found yourself cuddled between your family. Carol was on one side with Ellis and Addison squished on the other. 

You carefully crawled out of the bed trying not to wake the others. You figured it still must have been pretty early if Carol was still in bed. 

You're side still hurt when you moved, but you were glad they were just bruises. Your ankle was still hurting but it no longer hurt to walk as much. 

When you opened the RV door you were immediately hit with the cold fresh air. You loved the feeling. The dawn air gave you goosebumps, so you went back inside for your jacket and pulled it on before venturing further outside. 

The sun was just starting to rise, the light creating a show of color in the sky. The stars were still visible, and you stood there memorized by them. You remembered the days when you use to sleep under those stars. 

You mourned the days you'd never get to have. The camping trips you'd never again go on. The husband you'd never meet. The children you'd never raise. 

You were thankful, at least, that you still had your family. You couldn't imagine going through all this alone. 

The morning air was cold and crisp. It bit at your face and summoned goosebumps upon your arms. You breathed in through your mouth, and your lungs filled with a fresh breeze. You let out a satisfied sigh. 

You joined Rick on top of the RV where he stood watch. He glanced up at you and muttered a quiet morning as you sat down beside him. 

"I can keep watch if you wanna get some more shut eye," you offered but he shook his head. "I don't think I could sleep right now. Too busy thinking," he told you as he gazed back at the empty field. 

"Andrea and I are going out to look for Sophia. Keep an eye on Daryl. You need to make sure he doesn't go out looking, too." he said after a pause of silence.

You gave him a confused look as you tugged at the sleeves of your jacket. "You think he'd listen to me if I tried? You should ask Carol, he likes her a lot more."

Rick chuckled and shook his head, "he wasn't running around doing arts and crafts for Carol."

"He gave Carol a flower, he gave me a rock." you deadpanned. It was a great rock, very smooth. It also had a dog painted on it. You loved the rock. 

"Your sister told him it was the only way to make amends. When Patricia couldn't find any paint he made Glenn go get some from town." Rick was smiling, he had found the whole ordeal to be rather amusing, even on such a terrible day as yesterday. 

You turned away slightly so Rick wouldn't see the smile on your face. "So when are you gonna teach me how to shoot?" you asked, hoping that Rick would stop teasing you about Daryl.

"I can teach you tomorrow..."

"Awesome!"

"...If you keep an eye on Daryl."

You shot him a look of betrayal. "Fine! I'll Darylsit for you but these better be some damn good lessons!" you spat, earning a laugh from the sheriff. 

The two of you sat in silence afterwards. You were in peace, surrounded by the sounds of the woods. Crickets, frogs, you even heard an owl at one point. You glanced over at Rick and saw the troubled look on his face.

He had mentioned earlier that him and Andrea were going after a lead on Sophia. You had heard yesterday that Daryl had found her doll. Perhaps he was losing hope that she would be found, perhaps he was just worried about her. 

She was out there somewhere, you had to believe that.

"We'll find her, Rick. She's gonna love it here." you assured him and the worry in his eyes seemed to double. You frowned and placed a hand on his shoulder. "What's wrong?"

Rick sighed, his shoulders slouched, "Please don't tell anyone yet, I don't want anyone to panic until I can convince Hershel otherwise, but he wants us to leave after we find Sophia."

He wants us to leave? But where would we go? We almost starved out there, we've already lost so many of our own. "We can keep heading to that Fort, right? We survived before, I'm sure we can again." You said unconvincingly. You didn't know if you could make it out there. 

"We can't leave," Rick told you, his voice was broken, "Lori's... she's pregnant. We can't leave." 

You're were shocked, Lori was pregnant? You couldn't imagine bringing a child into this world. Rick was right, we couldn't leave. "Hershel is a kind and understanding man. If anyone can get through to him it's you." you reassured him, giving his shoulder a squeeze.

"I'll help anyway I can, I'm here for all 4 of you," you promised and Rick gave you a smile, "thanks Y/N"

\---

The sun had risen and you had started a fire for breakfast. Lori was unsurprisingly the first one awake, and she made breakfast for the camp using some of the farm eggs. People began to wake up one by one and as soon as breakfast was done they all helped themselves to a plate. 

You sat on the ground eating your eggs with Ellis beside you. Addison was still sleeping inside the RV. Apparently she had gotten angry at Sandy and her and Ellis had decided to sleep in the RV. 

You were shocked when Lori told you about it while she prepared the eggs. You couldn't imagine Addison defending you against her mom. It warmed you're heart, you really lucked out in the sibling department. 

Sandy was eating eggs on the other side of the camp. She avoided looking at you. You didn't mind.

It was quiet, very peaceful. the sounds of forks and the scrap of Andrea's knife against the sharpener filled the air.

"Um, guys"

You looked up and saw Glenn awkwardly glance around at the group.

"The barn's full of walkers." 

\---

The group made their way toward the barn, Shane peeked into the barn and jumped back fuming. "You can't tell me you're okay with this," he bit out at Rick as he angrily walked away from the barn.

"No I'm not but we're guests here, this isn't our land." Rick replied. He, too, was angry, but unlike Shane he kept a level head. That's why he was the leader.

"This is our lives!" Shane shouted and Glenn told him to lower his voice. You're eyes stayed glued to the barn. Was it even strong enough to hold walkers? What if they broke out, they could have killed us all. 

"We can't just sweep this under the rug," Andrea said and you agreed. "It's not safe here with a barn of those things," you added glancing over at Ellis seemed troubled by the situation. 

"It ain't right, not remotely," Shane said as he paced, "We've either got to go in there, we've got to make things right or we've just got to go. Now we have been talking about Fort Benning for a long time." 

"We can't leave," Rick growled out. We still hadn't found Sophia, and now with Lori expecting there was no way we could go. 

"Why, Rick, why?" Shane asked, clearly annoyed. 

"Because my daughter is still out there," Carol answered, just as annoyed as Shane was. 

Shane put his hands on his face and let out a sigh, it looked like he was holding back a chuckle. You were filled with disgust. "I think it's time we all start to just consider the other possibility." Rick interrupted, "We are not leaving her behind."

"I'm close to finding this girl," Daryl snapped from beside you, "I just found her damn doll two days ago!"

"You found her doll, Daryl, that's what you did. You found a doll." Shane said, shouting out that last part. They started shouting at each other and Rick moved to get between them.

"If she saw you out there, all methed out with your buck knife and geek ears around your neck, she would run in the other direction!" Shane yelled and Daryl went to attack him. Rick tried to keep them apart and was yelling at them to settle down as the two attempted to tear each other apart.

You quickly ran to Daryl's side and grabbed his arm to stop him. He ripped it away from you and glared but then stopped when he saw it was only you. You pushed him away from Shane and he stepped back glaring daggers into the former police mans back. 

Rick tried reasoning with Shane but the heated man kept screaming at his best friend.

"If we're gonna stay, if we're gonna clear this barn, I have to talk him into it. This is his land." Rick's voice was full of venom. You're hand was still on Daryl's arm. You felt grip you're other arm and you pulled her closer. 

Dale stepped forward "Hershel sees those things in there as people. Sick people. His wife, his-his stepson." Rick looked at him in utter disbelief, shocked to find out that he had known. Shane started to shout again and you heard a loud banging noise from behind you that made both you and Carol jump. 

The walkers started banging on the door. The chains that kept it closed started to rattle as you grabbed Carol and Daryl and backed away in fear. 

\---

"What do we do? We can't stay here with THAT!" Ellis ranted as he gestured toward the barn. You looked over and saw Shane inspecting the door. Ellis ran his hands through his hair and he paced. "Is nowhere safe nowadays??" he asked as he came to a halt in front of you. "I know I'm the older sibling here, but you're smarter than me. What do we do, Y/N."

"We wait, I trust Rick's judgement. Maybe he can get through to Hershel." you said as you crossed your arms and stared at you're feet. "We should tell Addison, I don't want her to run off to play in the barn or anything."

"Are you sure that's a good idea? I don't want to freak her out." Ellis said as he looked over to the RV where Addison was sleeping. "Maybe it would be better if we didn't tell her."

"No, she needs to know. We can't start keeping her out of the loop on important events." you said and Ellis nodded, the two of you hugged goodbye as he left in the direction of the RV. You stood there for a while, staring at the barn in the distance.

The barn filled with corpses. 

You were about to head back toward where Ellis had went when you saw Daryl storm out of the stable. You could hear Rick in the back of your head telling you to make sure he wasn't going anywhere. 

You made your way toward his tent where he had stormed off to, where you saw him angrily sharpening his arrows. "Knock knock," you said as you knelt down beside him. 

"The hell do you want," he snapped and you glared back at him. He between you and his hands, unable to hold the eye contact. 

"Don't go saying anything you'll regret, Daryl," you told him in a soft voice, "now tell me what's up." You put a reassuring hand on his shoulder and he continued staring at the arrow in his grasp.

"I made Carol cry," Daryl muttered, "she said that she didn't think we'd find her and I called her a stupid bitch." You wrapped an arm around him and shifted closer.

"Carol's just scared, scared of losing you or anybody else. We'll find her, she knows that," you assured him as you hugged him. He tensed at first before relaxing into the embrace. "You take a breather, calm down a bit, then go and apologize for making her cry, okay?"

"Okay," he muttered as you pulled away from him. He looked at you with those blue puppy eyes that made you wanna hug him again, but you pushed yourself up off the ground and said your goodbyes.

\---

"You wanna learn how to braid, too, Carl," you jokingly asked and you chuckled as Carl's nose wrinkled in disgust.

"No way, that's for girls!" he said and you leaned over to ruffle his short brown locks. "That's not just for girls, you can have long voluminous hair too someday, kiddo," you teased him and he let out an ewww while Beth and Addison laughed beside him. 

You were sat on the porch of the farmhouse with Beth, Patricia, Carl, and Addison. You had just taught Beth how to braid hair using little Addie as an example ad Beth had copied your technique flawlessly. 

You had even braided your own hair for the first time since Amy had died. You had missed the look. 

Ellis was sat on the other side of the porch tuning a guitar that Glenn had given him. Maggie and Glenn sat beside each other on the steps.

"So, Ellis worked in a music store, huh? What did you do Y/N?" Maggie asked and you looked up to see her smiling at you. You could feel everyone's eyes on you and you saw Ellis smirking. 

"Yeah, Y/N, what did you do for a living?" Ellis asked teasingly earning a glare from his eldest sister. 

"Well, if you must know, I was a seeker of adventure," you said and Ellis laughed. "Seeker of adventure? That's what you call it?" You chucked a hairbrush at him. 

"I had saved up enough allowance money from my childhood up to my college graduation to not have to work for a few years so yeah I'd call myself a seeker of adventure since I did, in fact, seek many adventures. Unlike some people who were so irresponsible with their money that they had to get a job right out of high school." you replied and Ellis muttered out a touche while Addison giggled.

"What did you go to college for?" Beth asked and you felt embarrassed. "I--uh, I went to college for art," you sheepishly replied and Maggie and Beth started asking about your artwork making you feel even more embarrassed. \

Before you could answer, you spotted Daryl and Carol making their way toward you. You were about to call out to them when T-Dog's voice cut you off. 

"Do you know what's going on?" T-Dog asked and you noticed Andrea beside him. "Where is everyone," she asked and Glenn stood up to meet them, "You have't seen Rick," the smaller man asked.

"He went off with Hershel. We were supposed to leave a couple hours ago," Andrea told him right as Daryl and Carol arrived at the scene. "Yeah you were," said the hunter, "what the hell?" 

You stood up from the porch and handed Addison over to Patricia before joining the others gathered in front. "Does anyone know where they went?" you asked and a few people shook their heads. 

"Dammit, is anybody taking this seriously," Daryl asked, "we got us a damn trail," he said as he pointed out to the woods where you noticed Shane arriving with the bag gun. 

"You with me man?" Shane asked as he handed Daryl a shotgun from the bag. Daryl accepted it, cocking the gun and following Shane as he continued to hand the guns out. "It's time to grow up." he said as he handed T-dog a pistol. 

"Thought we couldn't carry?" T-Dog asked and Shane made his way over to you. "We can and we have to," he said as he offered you a shotgun, "Are you with me?" he asked and you nodded taking the gun from the former officer. 

"Look, It's one thing sitting around here picking daisies when we thought this place was suppose to be safe but now we know it ain't," he said addressing the whole group before turning to Glenn. "How about you man? You gonna protect yours?" he asked as he offered Glenn a shotgun from the bag which the younger man accepted. 

"Can you shoot," Shane asked Maggie. "Can you stop," she bit back, " You do this, you hand out these guns, my dad will make you leave tonight." 

"We have to stay, Shane," Carl said right as Lori appeared from inside the house asking what was going on. "We ain't going anywhere, okay?" Shane told Carl before turning back to the rest of the group. "Now look, Hershel's just gotta understand. Okay? Well, he's gonna have to. Now we need to find Sophia, am I right?"

He knelt down and tried to get Carl to take a pistol before Lori pulled Carl away and got in Shane's face. "Rick said no guns, this is not your call. This is not your decision to make." she said before being interrupted by T-Dog going "Oh Shit."

Everyone turned to see Rick and Hershel leading walkers on a stick toward the barns. Shane ran toward them and everyone ran to follow him. Ellis stopped you, he held a scared Addison in his arms. 

"Get her inside," you told him before running off to join the others. 

Shane was shouting about the walkers when you made your way over to them. "Could a living breathing person walk away from this?" Shane asked as he pulled out his pistol and shot one of the walkers multiple times. 

"Shane enough!" Rick yelled and Shane made his way over to the walker. "You're right, man. That is enough," he said before shooting the walker in the head. The geek fell to the ground, Hershel looked to be in shock. He really must see these things as people, you couldn't understand it. 

Everyone froze in shock. "Enough risking our lives for a girl who is gone," Shane yelled. You turned to see Carol gasp. You noticed Ellis, Sandy, and Addison stood near her instead of in the house like you had told him to. 

"Enough living next to a barn," he continued, you turned back toward him, "Enough, Rick, it ain't like it was before. Now if y'all want to live, if you want to survive, you got to fight for it! I'm talking about fighting right here, right now."

Shane broke off the lock on the barn you readied your shotgun, standing between the barn and you're family. The walkers pushed open the door and started making their way towards the group. 

You moved up toward Shane and aimed taking out one of the walkers. You continued firing on the walkers who continued to pour out of the barn one by one they fell as you and the others fired on them. 

Eventually they stopped coming, you lowered your gun and let out a breath you didn't know you were holding. The group just stood their in silence, you looked back and saw Beth crying. The Greene's all looked sick. They just witnessed a slaughter of people. 

You heard growling and turned back toward the barn and saw a figure emerge from the barn. The figure of Sophia, her eyes empty. You're breath hitched and you heard Carol calling out to her child. She ran toward he but Daryl stopped her holding her back as she cried.

You heard Addison start to cry behind you, but you found yourself unable to move. You watched as Sophia shuffled toward you, as she growled at you. You raised your gun to shoot her but ended up choking out a sob instead.

You felt Rick's hand on your shoulder as he stopped beside you before pulling out his python and stepping toward the undead girl. He raised his gun, and he pulled the trigger.


End file.
